There was one embarrassing moment at the White House yesterday… I guess when they brought out the Declaration of Independence President Bush kept looking for the treasure map on the back.
-Jay Leno
New Diet
Getting Kinky…
A man and a woman are sitting side by side at a bar getting really wasted. They are both really depressed. The man asks the woman why she’s so down and she replies, “My husband left me because he said I was too kinky in bed.””What a coincidence!” he said, “My wife just left me. She said I was too kinky in bed too.”So they start talking and they find that they have much in common so they decide to go to the woman’s apartment and have kinky sex. When they arrive at her apartment, she tells him she needs a few minutes so she can slip into something more comfortable. She comes out of the bathroom with a tight, black leather outfit with a whip, handcuffs, a strap- on cock, and a 12 inch studded dildo. Then she hurries into the kitchen and comes out with Tabasco sauce, whipped cream, and a rolling pin. Then she notices that the man is putting on his coat and is walking towards the door.”What’s going on?”, she asks.”I thought you wanted to get kinky?”He turns around and says, “I just fucked your dog and shit in your purse. I’m all done.”
Christian Trained Pe
A Christian couple wanted to get a family pet. They felt it important to own a Christian trained pet. So, they went pet searching. At a kennel specialising in Christian trained pets, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash.When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws with dexterity. They were impressed, purchased the animal, and went home. That night they had friends over. They were so proud of their new dog and his major skills, that they called the dog over and had him show off his Bible fetching ability.The friends were very impressed, and asked whether the dog was able to do any of the usual dog tricks, as well. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn’t thought about “normal” tricks. Well, they said, “let’s try this out.”Once more they called the dog, and they clearly pronounced the command, “Heel!”Quick as a wink, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man’s forehead, closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.
Question and answer blonde joke
Men
I’ve learned that it takes years to build…
How do you fit four
What do a lawyer and
Una vez, un se�or necesitaba
Una vez, un se�or necesitaba empleo, entonces hoje� los empleos disponibles en el diario y vi�:
“Se buscan personas que sepan hacer cosas raras.”
Inmediatamente fue al lugar y le preguntaron que cosa rara sab�a hacer, entonces el dijo:
“Bueno, yo s� hacer como p�jaro.”
“Pero no sea ridiculo, �y a nosotros qu� nos importa una persona que sepa hacer como p�jaro? �v�yase! �fuera!”
Y se fue volando…