Category: blondes

How to keep a blonde busy all day

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Q. Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A. To see what was on the other side.

Q: How do you make a blonde’s eyes light up?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Three women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, die and are at
the Pearly Gates. St. Peters tells them that if they want to
enter Heaven, they need to walk up stairs that have one hundred
steps and that on each step, they’ll be told a joke. If they
laugh, they’re immediately sent to Hell.

So the brunette goes and on the third step, she cracks up
because of the joke.

Then the redhead goes and is able to control herself until the
thirteenth step, but then cracks up too.

It is the blonde’s turn. She goes up every step and listens to
the jokes without laughing. St. Peters is amazed and decides to
give her a boring joke for the last step to see what will
happen. So she hears the joke and cracks up.

Before sending her to Hell, St. Peters asks her why she laughed
at the very last step with a joke so boring and she simply
answers, “Well, I just understood the joke from the first
step!!!”

One day a husband was chiding his beautiful blonde wife about leaving her keys in the ignition of her car.

“If I take them out of the car I lose them,” she reasoned.

“Yes dear, but what if someone steals your car?” the husband countered.

“Oh that’s okay,” the wife chirped happily, “I keep a spare key in the glove box!”

A brunette was doing jumping jacks on a railroad track shouting twenty-one repeatedly. A blonde walks by and said, “Wow, that looks fun, could I try?” The brunette stepped aside and watched the blonde. Then, the train came by and smashed her. The blonde then got back on to the track and began shouting, twenty-two repeatedly

Q: What does a blonde say if you blow in his/her ear?A: “Thanks for the refill!”

Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
A: You don’t let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.

what would u do if u seen a blonde in a tree.

A:leave her there

Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?

To keep from bruising their ears.

Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis

A blonde’s house is on fire. She calls 911 and says, “My house is on
fire.” The dispatcher says, “Well, can you tell me how we get there?”

“Duhhhh, in the big red trucks, of course.”

What goes ‘vroom-screech-vroom-screech’? A blonde at a flashing red light.