Category: blondes

Q. What do you call a line of blondes standing ear
to ear.

A. A wind tunnel.

Whats the difference between a blonde & a brick? the brick only
gets laid once.

Why did God give blondes one more brain cell than he gave horses?

So they wouldn’t shit during the parade.

Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman

The blonde said she understood how the scientists figured out how far
away the stars are, their sizes and temperatures.
What she couldn’t understand is how they find out what the names of the
stars are.

How did the blonde burn her nose?

Bobbing for French fries.

Q: What’s the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?

A: The prostitute says, “Aren’t you done yet?”
The nympho says, “Are you done already?”
The blonde says, “Beige. . . I think I’ll paint the ceiling beige.

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if
he could see her license. She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys could
get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then
today you expect me to show it to you.”

There was this blonde who bought a coach ticket to go to Chicago. She boards the plane and sits in the first class area. The stewardess comes over and says “ma’am your ticket says coach you must move to the coach area”. The blonde says “I’m blonde beautiful and going to Chicago”. The stewardess says “you must move to the coach area”. The blonde says “I’m blonde beautiful and going to Chicago”. The stewardess goes over and gets the head stewardess. The head stewardess comes over and says “ma’am you must move to coach.” The blonde says “I’m blonde beautiful and going to Chicago”. The stewardesses look at each other and decide to go get the captain. The captain comes over and says” ma’am your ticket says coach you must move to the coach area”. The blonde says “I’m blonde beautiful and going to Chicago”. The captain shakes his head and bends down and whispers in her ear. All of a sudden she jumps up grabs her luggage and goes over to the coach area. The stewardesses look at each other and ask the captain “What did you say to her?” The captain says ” I told her first class wasn’t going to Chicago.”

What do you call a brunette between two blondes?

The translator!

Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold?
A: They don’t have to worry about blowing their brains out.

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, “I was ironing wen the fone rang – but instead if picking up the fone i accidently picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.”
“Oh dear,” the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. “But. What happened to the other ear?”
“The son of a B***H called back!”

There were three people stranded on an island, a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore. So she announced, “I’m going to try to swim to shore.” So she swam out five miles, and got really tired. She swam out ten miles from the island, and she was too tired to go on, so she drowned.The second one, the redhead, said to herself, “I wonder if she made it. I guess it’s better to try to get to the mainland than stay here and starve.” So she attempts to swim out. The redhead had a lot more endurance than the brunette, as she swam out 10 miles before she even got tired. After 15 miles, she was too tired to go on, so she drowned.So the blonde thought to herself, “I wonder if they made it! I think I’d better try to make it, too.” So she swam out 5 miles, ten miles, fifteen miles, and finally nineteen miles from the island. The shore was just in sight, but she said, “I’m too tired to go on!” So she swam back.