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A blonde and her husband are asleep when the phone rings, she answers it. After a few minutes the blonde says,”I don’t know. That’s like two thousand miles away,” and she hangs up the phone.
“Who was that?” asks her husband.
“It was some woman asking if the coast was clear!”
The Blonde’s Revenge!
* Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
It matches their mustache.
* What’s black, blue, and brown and lying in a ditch?
A brunette who’s told too many blonde jokes.
* What’s the real reason a brunette keeps her figure?
No one else wants it!
* What do brunettes miss most about a great party?
The invitation.
* Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners?
So brunettes can remember them.
* What do you call a brunette in a room full of blondes?
Invisible.
* What’s a brunette’s mating call?
“Has the blonde left yet?”
* What do you call a good looking man with a brunette?
A hostage
* Who makes bras for brunettes?
Fisher-Price
A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:
Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row !!
Blonde: That’s nothing; last night I had over hundred.
Brunette: My god ! I had no idea he was that good.
Blonde: (looking shocked) oh, you meant with one guy. . .
Whats black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?
A blonde electrician.
What is black, blue, red, and brown?
A Brewnette that has told to many Blonde Joke.
What does a brewnette always miss at a great party?
The invitation.
Why are blonde jokes so short?
So that brewnettes can understand them.
What is a fine lookin’ man with a brewnette?
A hostage.
Q: Why don’t blondes eat Jello?
A: They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar on the top of their head?
A: All you can eat, under a buck.
Q: Why don’t blondes eat pickles?
A: Because they can’t get their head in the jar.
Q: Why don’t blondes eat bananas?
A: They can’t find the zipper.
Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earings?
A: They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.
Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means stop.
Q: Why do blondes wear red lipstick?
A: Because red means “Stop, wrong hole.”
Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been in your refrigerator?
A: By the lipstick on your cucumbers.
Q: Why don’t blondes use vibrators?
A: They chip their teeth.
Q:What do blondes and turtles have in common?A:If they are on their back, they’re screwed–Submitted by: Adam E.
Once upon a time, a blonde became so sick of hearing blonde
jokes that she had her hair cut and dyed brown. A few days
later, as she was driving around the countryside, she stopped
her car to let a flock of sheep pass. Admiring the cute woolly
creatures, she said to the shepherd, “If I can guess how many
sheep you have, can I take one?”
The shepherd, always the gentleman replied, “Of course.”
The blonde thought for a moment and for no discernible reason
said, “352.”
This being the correct number, the shepherd was, understandably,
totally amazed and exclaimed, “You’re right! O.K., I’ll keep to
my end of the deal. Take your pick of my flock.”
The blonde carefully considered the entire flock and finally
picked one that was by far cuter and more playful than any of
the others.
When she was done, the shepherd turned to her and said, “O.K.,
now I have a proposition for you. If I can guess your true hair
color, can I have my dog back?
There are 3 girls in the third grade, a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde.
Who has the best figure?
The blonde. She’s 19.
Q: What does a blonde owl say? A: What, what?
Q: How can you tell when a fax had been sent from a blonde?A: There is a stamp on it.
how do you make a blonde giggle?
tell her a joke on friday