Category: blondes

One day, a blonde and a brunette were out for a ride in the blonde’s new car. Suddenly, some jerk pulls in front of them. The blonde then puts her lips on the steering wheel.
The brunette feared for her life, but had the courage to ask, “What are you doing?!”

The blonde calmly replied, “I’m trying to blow the horn.”

A Blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends.

Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!

Blonde: That’s nothing; last night I had over a hundred.

Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.

Blonde: (looking shocked) Oh, you mean with one guy.

A blonde was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. “I
want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then
skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see
you, you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds.”

When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20
pounds.

“Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor said, “Did you follow my
instructions?”

The blonde nodded. “I’ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop
dead that 3rd day.”

“From hunger, you mean?”

“No, from skipping.

How did the blonde break her arm raking leaves??

She fell out of her tree.

Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes to his favourite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman. Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he requested to look around the store today before he needed her help.She obliged and let him do his thing. Five minutes later, Jan came running up to him yelling,”Oscar! Oscar! I just saw someone driving off with your new Mercedes!”Oscar panicked, “Did you try to stop him?”She said, “I did better than that! I got the license plate number!”

She wouldn’t have been old enough to bear children!

i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am di am dumb,umb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i ai am dumb,m dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumbi am dumb,,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,i am dumb,

A blonde and her husband are asleep when the phone rings, she answers it. After a few minutes the blonde says,”I don’t know. That’s like two thousand miles away,” and she hangs up the phone.

“Who was that?” asks her husband.

“It was some woman asking if the coast was clear!”

how come blondes cant make kool-aid ? because they cant figure out how to put 2 qts. of water in that little packet.

A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends:

Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row !!
Blonde: That’s nothing; last night I had over hundred.

Brunette: My god ! I had no idea he was that good.
Blonde: (looking shocked) oh, you meant with one guy. . .

The Blonde’s Revenge!

* Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
It matches their mustache.

* What’s black, blue, and brown and lying in a ditch?
A brunette who’s told too many blonde jokes.

* What’s the real reason a brunette keeps her figure?
No one else wants it!

* What do brunettes miss most about a great party?
The invitation.

* Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners?
So brunettes can remember them.

* What do you call a brunette in a room full of blondes?
Invisible.

* What’s a brunette’s mating call?
“Has the blonde left yet?”

* What do you call a good looking man with a brunette?
A hostage

* Who makes bras for brunettes?
Fisher-Price

Whats black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?

A blonde electrician.