Category: blondes

Why can’t a blonde waterski?

When she gets wet, she lays down!

what did a blonde call her pet zebra ?
spot

A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and Santa clause are walking down the street.
There is a dollar on the sidewalk. Who picks it up?

The dumb blonde the other two don’t exist.

Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
A. “Look! They spelled MACYS wrong.

Q: what is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?

A: Trying to hold onto a thought.

Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo

A blonde and her sister were at the blondes house. Her sister said, “I here you are having a party. Why didnt you invite me?”
“I did” said the blonde. She walks over to the computer and picks up her sisters invite and says aw man the email man didnt come.

The first guy, a red head, says, “My wife is so dumb she went a
bought a washer and we don’t even have runnining water.”

The second guy, a brunet, says, “My wife is so dumb that she
went and bought a microwave and we don’t even have electricity.”

The third guy, a blond, says, “My wife is so dumb that one day
when I was going through her purse I found some condoms and she
doesn’t even have a dick.”

Two blondes decided to rob a bank together. The first
Blonde, Judy, planned the robbery and went over the plan with the second
blonde, Buffy, in great detail.

The robbery began. Judy drove up in front of the bank,
Stopped the car and said to Buffy, “I want to make
Absolutely sure you understand the plan. You are supposed to be in and out of
the bank in no more than three minutes with the cash. Do you
Understand the plan?”

“Perfectly,” replied Buffy.

Buffy went in the bank while Judy waited in the getaway
Car. One minute passed…three minutes pass…seven
Minutes pass… and Judy was really stressing out.

Finally, the bank doors burst open! And here came Buffy.She had a safe wrapped
up in rope and is dragging it to the car.

About the time she got the safe in the trunk of the car, the bank doors burst
open again with the security guard coming out. The guard’s pants and underwear
are down around his ankles while he was firing his weapon.

As the gals are getting away, Judy yelled, “You are such a Blonde! I thought
you understood the plan!”

Buffy said, “I did. I did exactly what you said!”

“No, you idiot!” snapped Judy. “You got it all mixed up. I said, ‘tie up the
GUARD and blow the SAFE!'”

Q what do u get when u put dumb and blonde togather.

A a dumb blonde

There was a blonde that was tierd of her life so decided to hang herself. So as a guy walked by and saw her hanging by the waste, and asked her what she was doing. She said that she was trying to hang herself. So the guy then asked her, “shouldn’t you be hanging by the neck instead of the waste?” The Blonde replied, “Well, I tried that, but then i couldn’t breath.”

why did a blonde steal a police car?
because she saw 911 and thought it was a porshe

What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette? Artificial intelligence.