Category: blondes

what goes ha ha ha bonk

a blond laughing her head off.

BLONDE: Whats the time?

READHEAD:3.45

BLONDE: (with confused look on her face) i have asked that question 13 times today and everyone keeps giving me different awnsers

A blonde and a brunette are sky-diving. The brunette jumps out of the plane and pulls the cord – nothing happens. She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing. The blonde jumps out of the plane and yells “Oh! So you wanna race, huh?”

Two blondes walk into a bar, each orders a drink. They go and sit down and
start toasting and cheering, “51 days! 51 Days!!” About five minutes later,
another blonde walks in,Orders a drink, and joins the other two in the cheering.

Finally, another blonde walks in with what looks like a
Cardboard picture. She puts the picture thing in the middle of the table, and
starts cheering with the others, “51 days!
51 days!! The Bar Tender starts too get really curious, so he walks over to
discover that the picture is a Cookie Monster Puzzle. He walks over to one of
the blondes and asks, “What on earth are you doing??” “Well,” the blonde says,
“everyone thinks blondes are so stupid, so we proved them wrong. On the box of
this puzzle, it says 2-4 years, but we finished it in only 51 days!!!

A blonde was seen by a Pepsi machine and she dug in her pocket
and put some money in the Pepsi machine. She Crossed her fingers
mumbling “Please, please, please.” and she pushed a button. Of
course, a Pepsi came out and she started jumping up and down. A
man came up to her and said “Lady, What are you doing?!?” The
blonde looked at him and said mockingly, “Duh, I’m winning!”

What do a lightly cooked steak and a smart blonde have in common?

They’re both considered rare.

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?

A: So she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping pills.

a few jokes for your enjoyment:

one day, a blonde walked out side four or five times to her
mailbox, until her neighbor asked what in the world is she doin.
Then she replied, my computer said that i have mail!

A man went to the doctor’s. The doctor came in and said, “Well,
I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that
you have an inoperable brain tumor. The good news is our
hospital has just been certified to do brain transplants and
there has been an accident right out front and a young couple
was killed and you can have whichever brain you’d like. The
man’s brain costs $100,000 and the woman’s brain costs $30,000″.
The patient could not help but ask, “Why such a large difference
between the male and the female brain?” The doctor replied, “The
female brain is used.”

Fred was trying to show his wife that women talk much more than
men. To prove his point he showed her a scholarly study that
showed men, on average, use about l500 words per day as opposed
to women, who use at least 3,000. Nancy, his wife, pondered this
for a little while and then thought of an answer. “Women”, she
said, “must use twice as many words as men, because they have to
repeat every thing they say.” “What?”, Fred answered.

When a bachelor marries, his wife has three qualities – she is
an economist in the kitchen, an aristocrat in the living room
and a devil in bed. After a few years, sure enough the three
qualities remain, but not in the same order – she is an
aristocrat in the kitchen, a devil in the living room and an
economist in bed.

one day a indian boy says to his dad “why do indians have such long names” “well son when an idian baby is born, the father goes out and the babys name is the first thing he sees” why do you ask two dogs fucking

yo mama so fet she stepede on unitedstates soil an the president said she was sent to destroy the u.s.

The authorities in America conducted a survey to ascertain why they did not receive many emergency calls from blondes. After exhasted studies the answer is “They can find the nine but cannot find the eleven”

one day a blonde was driving along when she sort of swirved in
front of a trucker. the trucker signaled for the blonde to pull
over. they both got out and the trucker noticed that the driver
was a blonde and he decided to take advantage of her. the
trucker drew a circle 10 feet away from her car on the ground
with a piece of chalk and told her to stand in it and NOT TO
MOVE. the guy went back to his truck and got a knife and poked
holes in her tires. when the trucker went back to the blonde,
he noticed that she was sort of giggling. he said,”oh so you
think that is funny?” so he went back to her car with the knife
and ripped and tore her leather seats. he went back to the
blonde and noticed that she was laughing a little harder. he
said ” oh so u still think that that is funny , huh?” so he went
back to her car and smashed all of her windows. he went back to
her and noticed that she was laughing so hard that she was
almost crying. he asked her,”WHAT IS SO FUNNY?!” she said,
“every time you turned around, i stepped out of the circle.”

Q: How do you measure a blonde’s intelligence?A: Stick a tire pressure gauge in her ear!