Here is a moral question for you. This is an imaginary situation, but it may
be interesting deciding what you would do.
The situation: You are in the Midwest, and there is a huge flood in progress.
Many homes have been lost, water supplies compromised, and infrastructure
destroyed. Let’s say you’re a photographer out getting still photos for a news
service, traveling alone, looking for particularly poignant scenes. If you were
to stumble across Bill Clinton struggling to keep from being swept away in a
raging river and you had a choice of rescuing him or getting a Pulitzer
prize-winning photograph of the death of a President, what shutter speed would
you use?
Author: admin
Adult shop
your mommas so fat not even god can help her
your mommas so fat she makes free willy look like a tic tac
your mommas so fat i have to take 3 busses and nine trains just to get on her good side.
Why does Clinton…
Why does Clinton were underwear?
To keep his ankles warm!
It is better to be
It is better to be part of the idle rich class than be part of the idle poor class.
Blonde History Lesson.
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease.
“Would you mind telling me, Doctor,” she asked, “how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?”
“That’s easy,” he replied. “You ask them a simple question which everyone should be able to answer with no trouble. If they hesitate, that puts you on the right track.”
“What sort of question would you ask Doctor?”
“Well, you might ask them…”
“Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them.
Which one?”
The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh –
“You wouldn’t happen to have another example would you?”
“I must confess I don’t know much about history.”
(DOH!)
Movie line – Not PC
One of many great lines from the movie: ‘As Good As It Gets’Scene: Reception area of a major publishing house. Jack Nicholson is best selling romance novel author Melvin Udall, a rather cranky and quirky old guy who really doesn’t like people at all. The cute young blond receptionist sees that she has a chance at last to gush over her favorite author and after a ritual bag of compliments asks:Receptionist: How *do* you write women so well?Melvin Udall: Quite simply: I think of men, and I take away reason and accountability.
A redhead & a blonde
A blonde and a redhead met in a bar after work for a drink, and were watching the 6 o’clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge.
The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn’t jump, and the redhead replied, “I’ll take that bet!” Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owed.
The redhead said, “I can’t take this, you’re my friend.”
The blonde said “No. A bet’s a bet.”
So the redhead said, “Listen, I have to admit, I saw this on the 5 o’clock news, so I can’t take your money.”
The blonde replied, “Well, so did I, but I never thought he’d jump again!”
Submitted by Danalockett
Edited by yisman and calamjo
The parsons
A Bishop invited his three sons home for a midwinter get-together.
On the cold first morning of their stay, he stood warming himself at a roaring log fire as the first son, a Parson, appeared from bed.
“Good morning father”,said he.
“Good morning,son replied the Bishop,’Did you sleep well?”.
“Wonderful sleep, I dreamt I was in heaven”.
“Great!, Come and stand by the fire” said the Bishop.
“Good morning, son, did you sleep well?.”
He asked his second son, also a Parson.
“Marvelous, I dreamt I was an angel!”. And he went to stand in front of the fire. The third, a commercial traveller appeared.
“Good morning” said the Bishop, not so eagerly, “How was your night?.
“I dreamt I was in Hell” said he, And it was just like home- you couldn’t get near the fire for Parsons”.
Hot Mamma
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, “You’re really doing great, aren’t you?”
Morris replied, “Just doing what you said, Doc: ‘Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'”
The doctor said, “I didn’t say that. I said, ‘You’ve got a heart murmur. Be careful.'”
Submitted by Phil
Bar Football
One day a man was dumped by his girlfriend and goes to a bar. He
sits down and orders a beer. He turns to his left and sees a gay
guy smiling at him. The gay guy asks him if he would play “Bar
Football” with him. The man was very drunk and says, “What the
hell, how do you play?” The gay guy says, “What you do is take a
beer and chug it down without stopping, that’s 6 pionts. Then
for the extra piont you must pull your pants down and lay a big
fart.”
The gay guy takes his beer and chugs it down, pulls down his
pants and lays a high piched fart. The gay guy says, “Your
turn!”. The man takes his beer and chugs it down. The gay guy
says “6 pionts!” As the man pulls his pants down the gay guy
whips his penis out and sticks it up the man’s ass and starts
screaming, “Block that kick, block that kick!!!”
The time
There was a guy. and he was working at his grocery store when a
lady asked for the time. he said.. time to get a watch.
the lady ran off and asked another guy.
he said the same thing. then she tried one more time.
this guy said. I dont know.
And she said,i do,its time to get a watch.
Which End Up?
Yo mama so ugly, when she was in labor the doctor asked which end!