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Several years ago the United States funded a study to determine why the head on a man’s penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two years and cost over $180,000. The results of the study concluded that the reason the head of a man’s penis is larger than the shaft was to provide the man with more pleasure during sex.After the results were published, Germany decided to conduct their own study on the same subject. They were convinced that the results of the US study were incorrect. After three years of research and costs in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a man’s penis is larger than the shaft to provide the women with more pleasure during sex.When the results of the German study were released, Australia decided to conduct their own study. The Aussies didn’t trust the US or German studies. So after nearly three weeks of intensive research at a cost of around $75, the Aussie study reached a conclusion. They came to the final conclusion that the reason the head on a man’s penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.

An Englishman was recently asked about the differences betweenEnglish and American people. He said there were three:1. We speak English and you don’t.2. When we hold a World Championship for a particular sport, we invite teams from other countries.3. When you meet the Head of State in England, you only have to go down on one knee.

Manolo y Paco se hacen narcotraficantes. En el primer intento de pasar mercader�a al pa�s vecino, son descubiertos por la guardia fronteriza. A Manolo lo hieren de un balazo en una pierna y lo detienen. Paco, con mejor suerte, logra huir. Un mes despu�s Paco va a visitar a Manolo, quien le dice:

“Paco, hazme un favor. La herida en la pierna se me ha infectado y aqu� en la c�rcel me la van a cortar. Quiero que recojas esa pierna y la lleves a enterrar a nuestro pueblo.”

“Por supuesto.”

A la semana siguiente, Paco retira la pierna extirpada, la lleva a su terru�o y procede muy compungido a su entierro. Vuelve al pa�s vecino a visitar a Manolo y �ste le dice:

“Paco, el maldito virus de la herida se ha extendido. Es menester que me corten la otra pierna. �No har�as lo mismo que hiciste con la anterior?”

Casi llorando, Paco acepta. A los pocos idas va a la enfermer�a, le entregan la pierna de Manolo y cumple la misma ceremonia de enterrarla en su terru�o. Un mes despu�s va a visitar a Manolo a la c�rcel y escucha esto:

“Mira Paco, esta endemoniada infecci�n no quiere detenerse. Se me ha extendido al brazo derecho y me lo van a cortar; yo te pido que…”

Paco lo interrumpe muy sonriente y acerc�ndosele para hablarle en secreto le dice: “�Qu� h�bil que eres Manolo… �Ya me he dado cuenta, ��te est�s fugando de a poco, eh?!

A little boy and his father walk into a drugstore and proceed down the aisle with the condoms.

The little boy sees a 3-pack of Trojans and asks his father who needs a 3-pack of condoms.

The father replies, “That’s for the high school boys, one for Friday night, one for Saturday night, and one for Sunday night.”

The little boy then asks, “Well, what about this 6-pack of condoms?”

The father says, “That’s for the college boys, two on Friday, two on Saturday, and two on Sunday.”

The little boy’s eyes widen when he sees the 12-pack of condoms and asks incredously, “What kind of man needs a 12-pack?”

The father replies, “Relax, son, that’s for the married man, one for January, one for February,…..”

Submitted by Glaci
Edited by Curtis