One day three blondes were in a car and they were going to Paultons Park.They were following the signs which all said Paultons forward. But then they saw a sign and it said PAULTONS LEFT so they turned round and went home.
Category: blondes
Difficult to spread
Q: What is the difference between butter and a blonde?
A: Butter is difficult to spread.
How to kill a blonde
Do you want to know how to kill a blonde?
Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.
To catch as much as they can that is over their he
Why do blondes wear their hair up?
To catch as much as they can that is over their heads.
How to kill a blonde
put a scratch n sniff sticker at the buttom ofa deep pool (and blonde will sratch and sniff it)
Blonde in the Library.
A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, SLAMS a book down and screams at the librarian, – “This is the WORST book I’ve ever read!” “It has NO plot and far too many characters!”
The librarian looks up and calmly remarks –
“So, you’re the one who took our phone book…”
Cliff side accident
After a bizarre cliff side accident, all eleven members of the women’s outing found themselves hanging perilously from a rope over the edge of the cliff.
Ten of the women were blondes and one was a brunette.
After dangling there for a only a short while it became obvious that the rope would not hold all their collective weight.
They decided that to prevent the rope snapping and killing them all, one of them must sacrifice themselves and let go, to save the others.
Well, they talked about it for a while but no one could decide a fair way of choosing who should jump.
Finally, the brunette, exasperated by the indecisiveness of the blondes, could see that if nobody acted soon the rope was going to snap.
To save the others she bravely decided that it must be her who made the sacrifice.
She plucked up a little courage and told the others that she would jump to save them.
After giving a short but very moving speech that she hoped would be remembered after she’d gone, the blondes were so moved that they all started clapping!
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
Flying!
Why did the blond jump off the bridge?
A: To see if her maxipad really had wings..
Blonde Underwear
Q: Whay does a blonde wear underwear?A: To keep her ankles warm.Adam Senan
With a tire gauge! (da da dum)
Q: How does a blonde measure his/her IQ?
A: With a tire gauge! (da da dum)
Blonde v. Mosquito
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito quits sucking after you hit it.
Blonde History Lesson.
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease.
“Would you mind telling me, Doctor,” she asked, “how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?”
“That’s easy,” he replied. “You ask them a simple question which everyone should be able to answer with no trouble. If they hesitate, that puts you on the right track.”
“What sort of question would you ask Doctor?”
“Well, you might ask them…”
“Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them.
Which one?”
The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh –
“You wouldn’t happen to have another example would you?”
“I must confess I don’t know much about history.”
(DOH!)