Category: blondes

Q: why did the blonde cross the road?

A: to catch the chicken

How do you tell if a blonde has been in your refrigerator??……Lipstick on the cucumbers

There was this blonde and she was sitting in the car with her older brother! She tried to touch his radio and he said “Dont touch that or i will be you up!” so she waited a little bit a few seconds later she touched his horn. She said “What wil the horn do if i touch it?” The brother replyed ” IT WILL HONK!”

DOH!DOH!DOH!

how did the blonde drowned?
ther was a scartch and sniff stick on the botom of the pool

Q. Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A. To see what was on the other side.

A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.

The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.

Her friend said, “Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?”

“HellOOOOOOO,” answered the blonde. “They’re watch dogs!”

Submitted by Sherri
Edited by Curtis

A blonde got a dent in her car and took it in to the repair shop.

The repairman, noticing that the woman was a blonde, decided to have a wee bit of fun.

So he told her all she had to was take it home and blow in the tailpipe until the dent popped itself out.

After 15 minutes of this, the blonde’s blonde friend came over and asked what she was doing.

“I’m trying to pop out this dent, but it’s not really working.”

“Duh, you have to roll up the windows first!”

Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Glaci

Trish: My tummy is getting awfully big, doctor.
Doctor: You should diet.
Trish: Really? What color?

What are the 2 ways Blondes and dogs are the same?They can both bleed for a week without dying and bury a bone without getting there nose dirty.

Q: What is dumber than a brunette building a fire under the water?A: A blonde trying to put it out.

One day while on patrol, a police officer pulled over a car for speeding. He went up to the car and asked the driver to roll down her window. The first thing he noticed, besides the nice red sports car, was how hot the driver was! Blue eyes, blonde, the works.”I’ve pulled you over for speeding, Ma’am. Could I see your drivers license?””What’s a license???” replied the blonde, instantly giving away the fact that she was as dumb as a stump.”It’s usually in your wallet,” replied the officer. After fumbling for a few minutes, the driver managed to find it.”Now may I see your registration?” asked the cop.”Registration….. what’s that….?” asked the blonde.”It’s usually in your glove compartment.” said the cop impatiently. After some more fumbling, she found the registration.”I’ll be back in a minute.” said the cop and walked back to his car. The officer phoned into the dispatch to run a check on the woman’s license and registration. After a few moments, the dispatcher came back, “Ummm… is this woman driving a red sports car?””Yes.” replied the officer”Is she a drop dead gorgeous blonde?” asked the dispatcher”Uh… yes.” replied the cop.”Here’s what you do.” said the dispatcher.”Give her the stuff back, and drop your pants.””What!!? I can’t do that. Its… inappropriate.” exclaimed the cop.”Trust me. Just do it.” said the dispatcher.So the cop goes back to the car, gives back the license and registration and drops his pants, just as the dispatcher said.The blonde looks down and sighs…..”Ohh no… not another breathalyser.

How did the blond die drinking milk?

The cow fell on her.