Category: blondes

How did the blonde explain how his helicopter crashed?

He said it was getting cold, so he turned off the ceiling fan.

What is chemistry’s greatest achievement ……
Artificial blondes!

The angry preacher…

The preacher rose with a red face. “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the K.K.K. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family!”

No one moved.

The preacher continued, ” Do you not have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood. Remember, you will be forgiven and in our heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression!”

Again all was quiet.

Slowly a “drop dead” gorgeous blonde with a body that would not stop rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke.

“Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding.
I never said you were a member of the Klu Klux Klan.
I told a couple of friends you were a wizard under the sheets.”

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all running from the cops. They find a barber shop, run in, and ask “got any places to hide?” he answers, “i dunno, you can check if you want” The brunette hides in a box, the redhead in a closet, and the blonde in a potato sack. A few minutes later a policeman walks into the shop. He goes to the barber and asks “did you see 3 strange women walk through here?” and he replies “i dunno, but you can check. He walks over to the box, kicks it, and hears “WOOF WOOF!” and he replies “damn dog!” goes to the closet, kicks it…”MEOW MEOW!”…”damn cat”. He by then walks to the potato sack, kicks it, and hears, “POTATO!!!”

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? Is it mine!

Q. Why was the blonde smiling during the lighting storm.

A. She thought she was getting her picture taken.

Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and your job?

A: Your job still sucks after 6 months.

What goes blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette?

A blonde doing cartwheels!

There is this man sitting on the beach. A woman comes up to him
and asks “whats that.” The man replies “oh thats just my bird.”
So the woman walks off and the man goes to sleep. The man then
wakes up an hour or two later and he realizes that his groin
hurts. He goes to the docter to ask whats wrong with him and
they dont know. So the man thinks that maybe if he goes back to
the beach he can ask the people around him what happened to him.
As soon as he returns to the beach he catches up to the woman
that asked what *that* was. So he goes and asks her if she knows
what happened. She says “I tried to pet your bird, but it spit
on me. So I broke its neck, cracked its eggs, and burnt his
nest.”

Q: Why did the blonde girl have bruises on her belly button ?

A:Because it turns out blonde boys arent that smart either.

Q: What do you call a smart blonde?

A1: A golden retriever.
A2: A labrador.
A3: An indicator of a really bad hangover.