A blonde and burnette was walking in the desert. The burnett comes across a magic lamp. When she picks it up a jeenie comes out and says i will give you 3 wishes but whatevre you wish the blonde will get half more than you. Alright replies the burnette.
1. I wish for 1 millin dollars. so the blonde is going to get 2 million who cares.
2. i wish for a nice looking guy. so the blonde wil get two so what!
3. i wish you would take this stick and beat me half to death. lol
Category: blondes
Submarine
Q: Did you see the submarine (built by blondes) with a screen door?A: Dont laugh, it keeps the fish out.
They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water
Why don’t blondes eat Jello?
They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
blondes and pitbals
Whats the difference between blondes and pitbals?
Answer- LIPSTICK
Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on…
Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
From crawling across the street when the sign said
“DON’T WALK”.
The Breast Stroke
In Florida there was a swimming contest. The contestants were a
brunette-Mindy, a redhead-Cindy, and a blonde-Sandy.
The second race was the Breast Stroke…the order of finish was:
The brunette came in first, the redhead second,… “but wait”, where was
the blonde??? She was still racing!
When she got to the finish line…she said ” THEY CHEATED!!”
The Judge said “how??”
The dumb blonde screamed…”THEY USED THEIR ARMS!”
You’ve Got Mail
A blonde went to her mail box several times way before it was time for the mailman to make his rounds.
A neighbor noticed her repeated trips to the curb and asked if she was waiting for a special delivery.
“No,” she replied, “My computer keeps telling me I have mail.”
Jump off Buildings
A brunette, a red head, and a blonde dared each other to jump
off a building.
The brunette jumped off a two-story building and broke a few
bones. It took the surgeons five years to reconstruct her body.
The redhead jumped off a three-story building. It took the
surgeons seven years to reconstruct her body.
The blonde jumped off a five story building and landed on a lamp
post. It took the surgeons ten years to wipe the smile off her
face!
Blonde interviewed for job
A blonde went to appear for the job of secretary. She was asked the basic questions like
What is your name: Marry Lou
From where do u belong? Housten USA
Education? Inter
In which subject?
The blonde replied by smiling….
INTERCOURSE..
A foursome.
Q: What do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125?
A: a foursome.
In the Car
Q: How did the blonde get lipstick on her steering wheel?
A: She was trying to blow the horn.
Dumb Blonde Test
Ask the following to a Blonde to see if she is a DUMB BLONDE or a smart blonde…yeah right…
1.Who do want to be most like in life:
A.Vanna White
B.Michelle Fiefer
C.Britney Spears
E.None of the Above
2.In a game of Hide-And-Go Seek, do you:
A.Run when you see the seeker
B.Stay hiding until the seeker finds you
C.Run when the seeker sees you
E.Follow the seeker quietly
3.What happens when you get Alzheimers Disease
A.You loose alot of weight
B.Gain weight
C.Get really smart
D.Loose your memory
4.How do you kill a bird:
A.Hit it
B.Throw it off a building
C.Cook it
D.All of the above
5.What’s an important question about pregnancy
A.Is it mine
B.How far along am I
C.Is it a boy or girl
D.What hospital should I go to for delivery
Don’t read them this part:
Results:
1.
A=5pts.
B=3pts.
C=2pts.
D=1pt.
2.
A=4
B=5
C=2
D=3
3.
A=4
B=3
C=5
D=1
4.
A=3
B=5
C=4
D=1
5.
A=5
B=1
C=3
D=2
TOTAL:
20 =Official Dumb Blonde; 15-19=Pretty Dumb; 10-14=Not Bad; 9-Smart for a Blonde