Category: blondes

These 3 men were traped on a burning building and out popped a magic guy. He said that they could each make a wish to get off but they have to do some of the work to. One of the men was a Chinees guy. He went first. He wished he could turn into a hawk…His wish was granted. He flew off the buildidng uninjured. Another guy was an African person. He wished he was a eagle…His wish was granted too. So he flew off the building also uninjured. The last person was an American blonde guy. He was walking towards the end of the building about to make his wish when he tripped on a rock….He fell off the building and said,”Ohh crap!!””………..and you guessed it! He turned into crap and fell down!
what a sad sad sad story

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How do u no when a blonde has been sending mail ?

A: when you see a bunch of envolopes in the disk drive

Well, there was this blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. So one evening she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do …I memorized all the state capitals.”One of the guys, of course, said “I don’t believe you. What is the capital of Nevada?””N”, she answered.

There once was this blonde riding a horse. After a while it began to speed up. She was hanging on by the tail and cut her forehead open. After a long struggle, she was able to climb back onto the horse. She then fell off the side and got her foot caught. The horse was now dragging her. She finally got back on the horse with a broken ankle, bruises all over, and she was bleeding from three different spots. Finally, the horse came to a complete stop. Thank goodness that the manager of the K-mart came out and shut the machine off.

What do you call a blonde fanning herself?

– Refuelling.

A bartender was working the late shift. While he was working, a beautiful blonde woman walked in and took a seat at the bar. She ordered up a Coors and sat there drinking for a while. Suddenly, the woman passed out cold on the stool. The bartender had a sudden thought, and so he cautiously looked around. Seeing that no one was around, he closed up the bar, and took advantage of the situation.

The next night, the bartender was, again, working the late shift, but some of his friends stopped by, so he told them about the previous night and his good time with the blonde woman. All of a sudden, the blonde walks in again. The bartender motions to his friends that she is the same lady. The lady sits down at the bar and orders another Coors. Eventually, she passes out. The bartender closes up shop, and him and all his friends take their turns.

The next night, the bartender is working the late shift. His friends show up, with all of their friends, and so there is a huge crowd in the bar. The woman walks in again, orders a Coors, drinks it, and then passes out. So, the barender closes up shop, and everyone has a turn.

The next night, even more people are waiting at the bar. The woman walks in and orders a Budweiser.

The bartender, his plans foiled, asks, “You don’t want the usual?”

She looks at him for a minute and shakes her head. “No. Coors makes my pussy sore!”

Two blondes were playing golf at a foggy par three, and could see the flag, but not the green. Each hit their ball anyway. When they walked to the green, they discovered one about three feet from the cup, while the other somehow had gone directly in.

They tried to figure out which ball belonged to who, since they were both using Titleist number threes. Unable to decide, they returned to the Club House and asked the golf pro for a ruling.

After hearing their story and congratulating them both on their superb shots under such adverse conditions he asked, “OK, so who was playing the yellow ball?”

Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis

What did the blonde say when the guy blew in her ear?

Thanks for the refill.

A blonde goes to a Pharmacy and she looks all around looking for “Bottom Deodarant”. she cant find it, so she askes the cashier and the cashier says that they dont sell “Bottom deodarandt” here. the blonde says that she got the deodarant here last time, i will prove it to you! so she goes out to her car and gets the deodarent and goes back into the Pharmacy. the cashier looks closely at the deodarant stick and says “Mam, this here aint no butt deodarant, this is arm deodarant!” then the blonde says “yea it is, it says right here on the directions, Twist and push up bottom”.

Five blondes go into a bar and one of them says to the bartender, “A round of drinks for me and my friends.”

They get their drinks and the raise their glasses to a toast of, “To 51 days!” and they drink.

The “head blonde” asks the bartender to set them up again.

Again, the blondes toast “To 51 days!” and they drink. After they order a third round, the bartender says that he has to ask what the toast means.

The head blonde says, “We just finished a jigsaw puzzle. On the box it said, “two to four years” and we finished it in 51 days”.

Q How do you keep a blond bissey?

A put her in a round room and tell them to finde the coners.

Two blondes were playing golf at a foggy par three, and could see the flag, but not the green. Each hit their ball anyway. When they walked to the green, they discovered one about three feet from the cup, while the other somehow had gone directly in. They tried to figure out which ball belonged to who, since they were both using Titleist number threes. Unable to decide, they returned to the Club House and asked the golf pro for a ruling.After hearing their story and congratulating them both on their superb shots under such adverse conditions he asked, ‘OK, so who was playing the yellow ball ?’