Why doesn’t a blonde ever talk during sex?
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Because her mother told her never to talk to strangers!
Category: blondes
blonde with child
why did the blonde change her babys diaper once a month?because the tag says good for up to 25lbs !!
Why does a blonde keep empty beer bottles…
Why does a blonde keep empty beer bottles in her fridge?
They’re there for those who don’t drink.
Half and Half
A blonde and burnette was walking in the desert. The burnett comes across a magic lamp. When she picks it up a jeenie comes out and says i will give you 3 wishes but whatevre you wish the blonde will get half more than you. Alright replies the burnette.
1. I wish for 1 millin dollars. so the blonde is going to get 2 million who cares.
2. i wish for a nice looking guy. so the blonde wil get two so what!
3. i wish you would take this stick and beat me half to death. lol
Why you shouldn’t
A man had called a local paint company and asked if they had anyone who could come over and do some painting that day. The company sent a blonde right over to do the job. The man meet the woman at the front door and asked her how much she would charge him to paint his porch. She stated that she would charge him 25$. He thought to himself “what a deal” since his porch was a long wrap around. The blonde also added that she would be done by the end of the day. The man thought to himself, “this is too good to be true!” and left for work for the day. When he arrived home he noticed that his porch didn’t even have a drop of paint on it. He went around the back and shrieked in horror as he seen the blonde putting the last bit of green paint on his new firebird.”what did you do to my firebird!” shrieked the man.”….Firebird?”questioned the blonde.”…and all this time I thought it was the porsche”
They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water
Why don’t blondes eat Jello?
They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.
blondes and pitbals
Whats the difference between blondes and pitbals?
Answer- LIPSTICK
Submarine
Q: Did you see the submarine (built by blondes) with a screen door?A: Dont laugh, it keeps the fish out.
Jump off Buildings
A brunette, a red head, and a blonde dared each other to jump
off a building.
The brunette jumped off a two-story building and broke a few
bones. It took the surgeons five years to reconstruct her body.
The redhead jumped off a three-story building. It took the
surgeons seven years to reconstruct her body.
The blonde jumped off a five story building and landed on a lamp
post. It took the surgeons ten years to wipe the smile off her
face!
You’ve Got Mail
A blonde went to her mail box several times way before it was time for the mailman to make his rounds.
A neighbor noticed her repeated trips to the curb and asked if she was waiting for a special delivery.
“No,” she replied, “My computer keeps telling me I have mail.”
The Breast Stroke
In Florida there was a swimming contest. The contestants were a
brunette-Mindy, a redhead-Cindy, and a blonde-Sandy.
The second race was the Breast Stroke…the order of finish was:
The brunette came in first, the redhead second,… “but wait”, where was
the blonde??? She was still racing!
When she got to the finish line…she said ” THEY CHEATED!!”
The Judge said “how??”
The dumb blonde screamed…”THEY USED THEIR ARMS!”
Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on…
Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
From crawling across the street when the sign said
“DON’T WALK”.