Who wants to be a blonde millionaire?

A blonde named Barbara is appearing on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire…

Regis: “Barbara, you’ve done very well so far – $500,000 and one lifeline left — phone a friend. The next question will give you the first ever Million dollars if you get it right … but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000 — are you ready?”

Barbara: “Sure I’ll have a go”

Regis: “Which of the following birds does not build it’s own nest? Is it……..
A – Robin, B – Sparrow, C – Cuckoo, D – Thrush.
“Remember Barbara its worth 1 Million dollars.

Barbara: ” I think I know who it…….. but I’m not 100%….No, I haven’t got a clue. I’d like to phone a friend Regis just to be sure.

Regis: “Yes, who, Barbara, do you want to phone?

Barbara: “I’ll phone my friend Carol back home in Brooklyn.”

(ringing)

Carol (also a blonde): “Hello…”

Regis: “Hello Carol, its Regis Philbin here from Who Wants to be a Millionaire-I have Barbara here and she is doing really well on $500,000, but needs your help to be a Million. The next voice you hear will be Barbara’s and she’ll read you the question. There are 4 possible answers and 1 correct answer and you have 30 seconds to answer — fire away Barbara.”

Barbara: “Carol, which of the following birds does not build it’s own nest? Is it: A-Robin, B-Sparrow, C-Cuckoo, D-Thrush

Carol: “Oh Gees, Barbara that’s simple…..Its a Cuckoo.

Barbara: “You think?”

Carol: “I’m sure.”

Barbara: ” Thanks Carol.” (hangs up)

Regis: “Well, do you want to stick on $500,000 or play on for the Million, Barbara?”

Barbara: “I want to play, I’ll go with C-Cuckoo

Regis: “Is that your final answer?”

Barbara: “It is.”

Regis: “Are you confident?”

Barbara: “Yes fairly, Carol’s a sound bet.”

Regis: “Barbara…..you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo …you’re right! – You have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience please put your hands together for Barbara.”

(clapping)

That night Barbara calls round to Carol and brings her down to a local bar for a celebration drink and, as they are sipping their Champagne, Barbara turns to Carol and asks “Tell me Carol, How in God’s name did you know that it was the Cuckoo that does not build its own nest?

Carol: “Listen Barbara, everybody knows that a Cuckoo lives in a clock.”

You’ve got mail

A blonde quickly went out to her mail box, looked in it, closed the door of the box, and went back in the house. A few minutes later she repeated this process by checking her mail again.She did this five more times, and her neighbor that was watching her commented: “You must be expecting a very important letter today the way you keep looking into that mail box.”The blonde answered, “No, I am working on my computer, and it keeps telling me that I have mail.”

Fallen bridge

A blond and her blond boyfriend went for a walk along the river. The blond walked across alone on a wooden bridge. While on the other side of the river, the bridge fell down. She called across to her blond boyfriend telling him that she couldn’t get back. He yelled in response, “Wait until dark, and I will shine my flash light across the river. Get on the light beam and walk back.” She replied, “No, I’ll get half way across the river, and you will turn the light off.”

Blonde Joke plus…

Two blondes are waiting at a bus stop.
When a bus pulls up and opens the door, one of the blondes leans inside and asks the bus driver: “Will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?”

The bus driver shakes his head and says, “No, I’m sorry.”

Hearing this, the other blonde leans inside, smiles, and twitters:
“Will it take ME?”

============

10 Blonde Science Fair Projects:

10) Are poisonous snakes really venomous?
9) Is lighter fluid flammable?
8) What hurts more: falling off a building, or a cliff?
7) Are knives sharp?
6) Can sharks hurt a human?
5) What happens if I stick my hand in a piranha aquarium?
4) Can I break my arm hitting it against a wall?
3) Can I go through a brick wall?
2) Can dogs talk?
1) Are blondes really dumb?

Potato

there was a blonde,brunett,and a black haired girl. thay just robbed a bank and was runing from the cops.the brunett jumped in a bag that said cat,the black haired girl jumped into a bag that said dog,and the blonde jumped into a bag that said potatos. The cops came and kicked the bag that said cat and she goes,”meeow.”then they kicked the bag that said dog and she said,”woof woof!”then they kicked the bag that said potato and she says,”po-taaa-toooooo”

Blonde Stewerdess

An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde
stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in
another city. So upon their arrival, the captain showed the
stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and
stay overnight.

The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the
day’s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew
which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering
what happened to her.

She answered the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn’t get out
of her room.

“You can’t get out of your room?” the captain asked, “Why not?”

The stewardess replied, “There are only three doors in here,”
she cried, “one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has
a sign on it that says ‘Do Not Disturb'”!!!

Women Drivers

A truck driver tried to edge his semi past the blonde lady driver on the road ahead of him as she was obviously having difficulty deciding which lane she wanted to be in. Finally, her mind made up, the woman veered into the truck driver’s lane and jammed on her brakes, which resulted in a slight collision.Unhurt but obviously harried, the blonde driver rushed over to the truck driver and started to bawl him out, barking, “You knew I was going to do something idiotic. Why didn’t you stop to wait and see what it was?”

Blonde Overboard

There is a blonde on the side of the road and two guys stop and say need a lift?She replies saying sure take me anywhere so she hops in the back of truck.Well the guys are going down the road and a truck is heading straight for them trying to crash them.They then run off the bridge they were on and fall into the water.The two boys get out but when they looked back there was only bubbles. Oh no! they cried. The blonde had not gotten out of the back yet.All of sudden the blonde shoots out of the water.The boys start saying thank goodness and all. Then one asks, not to be rude but what took you so long?The Blonde grinned and said I couldn’t get the Tail gate open!!!