Category: blondes

A certain virginal and shy college freshman was lucky to have a roommate who was considerably more experienced. When the bashful boy broke down and explained his predicament, his roommate was quick to offer to set him up with a blonde who’d made the rounds of the campus.

Just take this bimbo out to dinner and a show, and then let nature take its course, he explained reassuringly. This girl knows what the score is, and she’s even a natural blonde.

The roommate arranged the date as promised. The freshman was delighted by his cute, outgoing companion and they spent the evening dining and dancing. On the way home he parked his car in a dark lane, broke out in a cold sweat, and blurted out, “Gosh, I sure would love to have a little pussy.”

“I would too,” sighed the blonde, “Mine’s the size of a goddamn milk pail.”

one day a brunnet a redhead and a blonde were stranded on an island becouse there car stopped so they started to look around to see if they could find a way out so the brunnet took some food the redheadhed took some water and the dumb blonde took the car door the redhead and the blonde asked the brunnet why she took some food she said; ii case i get hungry and the brunnet and the dumb blonde asked the redhead why she brought water she answered; in case i get thirsty and so the brunnet and the redhead turned around and asked the dumb blonde why she took the car door and she answered; in case i get hot.

A blonde and her girlfriend went to the beach for the day. As they wandered up and down the shoreline in their bikinis the girlfriend began to notice that the blonde seemed to be having some difficulty walking.The girlfriend finally said, “Did you hurt your leg or something? You’re walking very strangely.”The blonde replied, “I have a big date tonight and I’ve got curlers in my hair.”

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead stranded on an island. Then they found a magic lamp, and each of them recieved a wish. The brunette wished that she could go home to her family, and the redhead wished the same thing. Finally it was the blondes turn. She wished that her friends could be with her on the island.

Q. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
A. Tell her a joke on Wednesday.

Q: Why don’t blondes eat Jell-O?
A: They can’t figure out how to get two cups of water into those little
packages.

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.

The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn’t serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.

The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn’t serve blondes.

Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.

Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.

To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn’t serve blondes.

The blonde asks the clerk, “How in the world do you know I am a blonde?”

The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,”That’s not a TV — it’s a microwave!”

Three blondes were walking through the desert when they found a magic genie’s lamp. After rubbing the lamp to make the genie appear, he said, “I will grant three wishes, one for each of you.” The first said, “I wish I were smarter”. So she became a redhead. The second blonde said “I wish I were smarter than her.” She became a brunette. The third blond said “I wish I were smarter than both of them.” So she became a man.

Three women, a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde worked together at an office. Every day they noticed that their boss, Ms. Taylor, left work a little early. So one day they met together and decided that when their boss left, they would all leave early too. The next day, when their boss left, they did too. The Brunette went home and straight to bed so could get an early start the next morning. The Red Head went home to get in a quick workout before her dinner date. The Blonde went home, walked into her bedroom, and saw her husband in bed with her boss. So she shut the door and left. The next day, the Brunette and the Red Head talked about going home early again. They ask the Blonde if she wants to leave early again. “No,” she says, “yesterday I nearly got caught!”

What’s the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you smack the mosquito it stops sucking!!

Q How do you make a blonde fart?

A Tell it to burp.

Legend has it that there is a restaurant in New York where, in
the Ladies Room there is a very special mirror. If one stands in
front of the mirror and tells the truth, one is granted a wish.
However, if one tells a lie–*poof*–you are instantly swallowed
up by the mirror, never to be seen again.

Sooooo, A redhead of questionable looks walks into the Ladies
Room and stands before the mirror and says, “I think I’m the
most beautiful woman in the world.”–*poof*–The mirror swallows
her.

Next a rather large brunette stands before the mirror and says,
“I think I’m losing weight.”–*poof*–The mirror swallows her.

Then an absolutely gorgeous blond comes in and stands before the
mirror and says, “I think….”–*poof*–