The Lie Detector Test

A blonde goes to a lie detector test where instead of it beeping it makes them explode.When she gets there she meets a red haired girl and a brown haired girl.The red haired girl goes first.She says i’m the prettiest girl in the world.She explodes.Next went the brown haired girl.She says i’m the sexiest girl in the world.She explodes.Finally the blonde goes.She says I think.She explodes.

3 women

there’s 3 women,a brown,a red,and a blonde.
they have all been captured and are getting ready to die.So the
people who has captured them have tied them up to a chair and
are getting ready to shoot them,the brown is first,being the
smartest,she has to come up with a plan really quick.The people
are getting ready to shoot her,
the people:ready,aim,
the brown:tornado,
so everybody runs for cover,ofcourse the brown gets away.
the next day,they are getting ready to shoot the red.She’s got
the plan down,she’ll do everything the brown did. They set her
down in the chair,tie her up.etc.,Now there getting ready to
shoot her.
The people:ready,aim,
The red:earthquake!!
everybody again,runs for cover and the red gets away.the next
day comes.Time for the blonde to die,she’s got the plan down
pat.so they set her in the chair,etc.
the people:ready,aim,
the blonde:fire!
{that’s how the blondes get there name.}

Alligator shoes

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana.

She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, “Maybe I’ll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!”

The shopkeeper said, “By all means, be my guest. Maybe you’ll luck out and catch yourself a big one!”

Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand.

Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank.

Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement.

Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back. Frustrated, she shouts out, “Damn it, this one isn’t wearing any shoes either!”

Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman

Fire bird

A guy calls up a pianter (a blonde) and askes how much would it be for him to get his porch painted green. The blonde answers 50 bucks. He says thats reasonable 4 a rape a round porch and tells her to come on over. She comes over and he tells her to start while he goes to work when the guy gets home he sees the blonde puting the finishing touch on his FIRE BIRD he screams ” what did u do to my fire bird” she answers wow all thiss time i thought it was a porche