The overweight blonde.

A blonde was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet.

“I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks.” He said. “The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds.”

When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds.

“Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor said, “Did you follow my instructions?”

The blonde nodded. “I’ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day.”

“From hunger, you mean?”

“No, from skipping!”

Blonde gets coffee

A blonde was recently hired at the office. Her first task was to go out for coffee. Eager to prove her worth to her new bosses, she grabbed a large thermos and hurried to the nearby coffee shop. She held up the thermos so that thecounterman could view it, and she asked, “Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?” The counterman looked at the thermos and replied, “Yes. It looks like about six cups to me.” “Oh good!” the blonde sighed in relief. “Give me three regular, one black, and two decaf.”

Coke machine

A blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a coke. The
blonde looks amazed and runs away to get some more coins. She returns and starts
feeding the machine madly and of course the machine keeps feeding out drinks.
Another person walks up behind the blonde and watches her antics for a few
minutes before stopping and her and asking if someone else could have a go. The
blonde spins around and shouts in her face: “Can’t you see I’m winning.”