Once the Indian prime minister Mr.Rajiv Gandhi wanted to visit Ethiopia and he
was successful in implementing his plan and he flew to that country,there he was
very pleased to hear from the President that they can have a call to heaven for
just 3 minutes at a charge of just 2 bucks.Rajiv Gandhi was very much pleased
and he called his mom then his grandparents and every one.Soon after his trip he
summoned all the Indian scientists and ordered them to build a telephone such
that he can call every one from his own country, after one month the scientists
came with the solution and Rajiv made the first call to heaven but the cost for
3 minutes was just more than 300 bucks so he summoned all the scientists and
asked them why the charge is so high, it is only 2 bucks in Ethiopia for which
the scientists replied that from Ethiopia it is just an local call but from
India it is an ISD.
Author: admin
Standing in line
In a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Surprised, the man in front turned and snarled, “Just what the hell you are doing?”
“Well,” said the guy, “you see, I’m a chiropractor and I could see that you were tense, so I had to massage your back. Sometimes I just can’t help practicing my art!”
“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!” the guy replied. “I work for the IRS. Do you see me screwing the guy in front of me?”
A man was driving in his red when he saw a…
A man was driving in his red when he saw a old priest standing by the side of the road. He stopped in front of the priest and said, ” hey do you need a lift.” The priest said, ” yeah i do. Can you drive me to the church on Maple drive?” ” sure hop in,” said the man in the car. The priest got in the back seat of the car. The man and the priest drove down the road about an hour when the man driving saw a lawyer waiting on the side of the road. The man driving then though, great i can run him over. He sped up. Then he remembered the priest in the back seat. Right before he hit the lawyer he swerved to the right. He said to the priest, “I’m so sorry priest i was going to hit the lawyer but I missed him. I am so sorry, please forgive me.” The priest then said, “that is ok I forgive you-” “Good” “- I got him with the sliding door!”
Missing??
“This is a comeback”
When God created brains, you must have been abscent.
Vulgar language
What were the first curse words heard on T.V.?
“Ward, you were a little rough on the Beaver last night.”
Lunatic Asylum: The place where
Lunatic Asylum: The place where optimism most flourishes.
Bill Gates
Bill gates dies and finds himself in pergatory, snacked up by God. God said “I’m letten you chose where you want to go.” Bill says “Whats the differance?” God said,”I’ll allow you a short visit at each to make up your mind.” The reply was lets see hell first. Hell was full of sandy beaches with beutiful women running aroud ang playing in the water. Bill said,”If this is hell, I want to see heaven!” So God took him to heaven. It was nice with all the angels floating around playing beautiful music. But, not as exciting as hell. So Bill said, ” Heaven’s nice and all, but I want to go to hell.” So Bill went to hell. A few weeks later, God decided to check on Bill. He found Bill in a dark cave being tortured by deamons. God asked, ” So, how ya’ doin’ Bill?” In a sad voice he said, “This is not what I expected. What happened to all of the beautiful women on the beaches?”
Bill Gates
Q:what is the difference between Bill Gates and a viberator?
A:a viberator is an artificial dick!
CLERKS
I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed
that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me
that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When
asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the
credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the
credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I
signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.
Tiolet
Where was the man going when he said totheloo
answer:to the loo
Twelve Inch Pianist
This guy walks into a bar, pulls out a tiny piano and stool, and a tiny little
man. The tiny man sits down, and starts to play the piano. This other guy
notices it.
�Hey, what’s that?�
�A twelve-inch pianist. Ya see, I found this magic lamp, rubbed it, made a
wish, I got a twelve inch pianist.�
�Can I try?� The man with the piano agrees and a minute later, a million ducks
fill the room.
�Ducks? I didn’t wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks!�
�Ya think I really wished for a twelve inch pianist?�
Give 100%
ALWAYS GIVE 100% AT WORK:
12% Monday 23% Tuesday 40% Wednesday 20% Thursday 5% Friday