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Un hombre quer�a demostrar a su esposa que las mujeres hablan m�s que los hombres, as� que le mostr� un estudio que dec�a que los hombres usan en promedio s�lo 15,000 palabras al d�a, mientras que las mujeres usan 30,000 palabras al d�a.
Ella lo pens� un momento y luego le respondi� a su marido que las mujeres usan el doble de palabras que los hombres porque siempre tienen que repetir todo lo que dicen.
El marido dijo: “�Qu�?”
What do you call a closet full of lesbians?
Liquor Cabinet.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
What do you get when you cross a Black with a Japenese?
Someone who on December 7th, gets an uncontrollable urge to attack Pearl
Bailey.
A soldier came back home from the army and found three kids in the house.
“Who are they?” he asked.
“Well, when you were leaving for the army, remember? I was pregnant. So, here
is Kolya. Then remember, when I came to visit you in the garrison? So, here is
Katya.”
“Yes. But who is the third? The third!”
“What do you want from him? The kid is sitting quietly, so let him sit in
peace!”
Earlier this year, the American Government funded a study to see why the Head of a Penis was bigger than the rest of it. After one year and $180,000.00 they concluded that the reason the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex.After the US published the study France decided to do their own. After $250,000.00, and 3 years of research, they concluded that the reason was to give the woman more pleasure during sex.Poland, unsatisfied with these findings, conducted their own study. After 2 weeks and a cost of around $75.46, they concluded that it was to keep a man’s hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead.
Four gay guys walk into a bar, there is only one stool left, so they turn it over and then they each take their seat.
The Vatican is releasing a new CD that features Pope John Paul II reciting prayers while rapping to rock music.
I think the new Pope is taking this thing a bit too far because today he announced he’s having a feud with the West Coast rappers!
I like eggs
A man and woman were celebrating their 50 year anniversary. That night, the woman comes out of the bathroom completely naked and looks at her husband who is already in bed. She says, “Honey, 50 years ago tonight, when I came out of the bathroom with no clothes on, what were you thinking?”
He said, “I was thinking that I wanted to suck your titties dry and fuck you until you couldn’t think straight.” She smiled at him and said, “So what are you thinking now?”
He said, “I think I did a pretty good job!”
3 girls went out and partied and got drunk. The next morning they were taking about who did the craziest thing last night. The 1st girl said I was so drunk I ran into a stop sign. The second girl says that�s nothing I rode up to the mc Donalds drive-in on a bike. The third girl goes that�s nothing last night I blowed chunks. The other girls say that�s nothing. And then the third girl says no chunks is my dog.
-Asher ([email protected])
En una examen de Espa�ol de quinto a�o de primaria, ven�a un ejercicio de ant�nimos.
Nubia contest�:
Limpio – Sucio. Arriba – Abajo. Chico – Grande. Hablar – Callar; y por �ltimo: Salado – “Suertudo”.
Cierto d�a se encuentra Pepito acostado en su cama, cuando siente que le empiezan a picar los zancudos, entonces va corriendo con su mam� y le dice:
“�Mam�, mam�, me est�n picando los mosquitos!”
Y la mam� le dice:
“No te apures hijito, solamente esp�ntalos y ya no pasa nada.”
Entonces el ni�o la obedece y los espanta agitando sus manitas, cuando de repente ve pasar unas luciernagas, y se sale corriendo de su cuarto gritando muy asustado:
“�Mam�, mam�, ahora me est�n buscando con linternas!”