What goes vroooom screech vroooom screech vroooom screech?
A blode going through a flashing red light.
Category: blondes
Horn
How did the blonde get lipstick on her steering wheel?
She was trying to blow the horn!
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
Blonde’s test day
The blonde reported for her University final examination which consists of ‘yes/no’ type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet – Yes for Heads and No for Tails. Within half an hour she is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on. ‘I finished the exam in half and hour. But, she says, I am rechecking my answers.’
Why did the blonde smile
Q: Why did the blonde smile when she walked the marriage aisle? A: She realized she gave her last blowjob.
Big Breasts
Why do blondes have big breasts?
God had to put their brain somewhere.
Breathe…
A blonde wearing a walkman walks into a barber shop to get a haircut.
When she sits down in the chair, the hair stylist says, “you have to take your headphones off before i can cut your hair.”
so she takes off the headphones.
A minute later she passes out.
when the paramedics get there, he picks up the headphones.
he listened to the recording. it said, “Inhale… exhale… inhale… exhale…”
What do blondes say
Q: What do Blondes say after sex?A1: Thanks Guys.A2: Are you boys all in the same band?A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Did you hear about the blonde who had two…
Did you hear about the blonde who had two chances to get pregnent?
She blew them both.
Blonde Goes ice fishing
A blonde once decided to go ice fishing. She drilled a hole
and began to fish. As she began a man walked up to her and said,
“Ma’am, I’ll make you a deal. If you catch a fish within 1 hour
then I will pay you $100. If you don’t, you pay me $100.” The
blonde thought and decide to take him up on his offer.
An hour had passed and she didn’t catch anything so she
coughed up her $100. “How did you know I wouldn’t catch
anything? Are you a psychic?” she asked the man. “No,” he
replied, “I am the owner of this ice rink.”
Bananas
Why don’t blondes eat bananas?
They can’t find the zipper.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
Blondes, lightbulbs and 911
Three blondes are attempting to change a light bulb. One of them decides to call 911: Blonde: We need help. We’re three blondes changing a light bulb.Operator: Hmmmmm. You put in a fresh bulb?Blonde: Yes.Operator: The power in the house in on?Blonde: Of course.Operator: And the switch is on?Blonde: Yes, yes.Operator: And the bulb still won’t light up?Blonde: No, it’s working fine.Operator: Then what’s the problem?Blonde: We got dizzy spinning the ladder around and we all fell and hurt ourselves.
Blonde Suicide
A blonde walks into a doctors office with a gunshot wound in her hand.
The doctor asks, “How did this happen?”
She replies, “Well, I was trying to commit suicide. I stuck the gun to my head and then…just before I pulled the trigger… I thought, this is going to be loud. So I covered my other ear before pulling the trigger”