How to get across the river

A blonde once got lost near a river. She traveled up and down it searching for a way to get to the other side.She tried walking in the shallow part of the river, and she even tried grabbing onto a branch that stretched half way across the river to try to swing to the other side. No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t get across.After many failed attempts, she finally felt like giving up. Yet, at the last moment, she saw a person walking by and decided to follow her–across the bridge.

Always Rings Twice

A blonde woman goes to the doctor and tells that him that both
her ears have been burnt. “Sit down and tell me how it
happened,” said the doctor.

“Well,I was just ironing my clothes, when I received a call and
instead of picking the phone I accidentally picked up the iron
and burnt my ear.”

“Well, that explains one ear, but what happened to the other?”

“The jerk called back!”

Thermos

A blonde woman walks into a store and is immediately curious about a shiny object on sale.

She asks the shop assistant, ‘What is that?’

The assistant responds, ‘It’s a thermos.’

The blonde then asks, ‘What does it do?’

‘It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.’

So the blonde buys one. The next day she brings the thermos to work with her.

Her boss, also a blonde, asks, ‘What is the shiny object?’

‘It’s a thermos.’

‘What does it do?’

‘It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.’

Her boss then asks, ‘What do you have in there?’

The blonde replies, ‘Two cups of coffee and a Popsicle.’