Category: blondes

Q: Why is a blonde like a door knob?

A: Because everybody gets a turn.

A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says, “Ma’am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?”She says, “Why, officer?””Because your breast is hanging out.”She looks down and says, “OH MY GOODNESS! I left the baby on the bus again!”

Q: What do you call a smart blonde?

A1: A golden retriever.
A2: A labrador.
A3: An indicator of a really bad hangover.

There was a blonde men walking thru town like normle, but only
onething, he was nude!
Someone on the street stopped the blonde man and asked why he
wasn’t whereing anything? the blonde man replied,

“Well… me and my girlfriend never had sex together before.
We were hangin’ in my room, and she took of her shirt outa’ no
where! then she said, ‘Now you take off yours’! So i did.
Then she took off every thing!!! then she said, ‘Now you’! so I
DID (in a hurry!)
Then she started to rub herself ALL OVER! and said, ‘it’s time
for you to go to town, big boy’.
so i did

two blonde guys get a new car so
they go to the mall to show it off.
when they get there they find to blonde
girls and they ask them out. they get to the car and realize that they left the keys in the car. so they say we need to find a way to unlock the door because its starting to rain and the top is down.

There is a blonde a brunette and a redhead all stuck on an island for about 1 year.

Until one day the brunette finds a lamp and rubs it real hard and a genie comes out.

The genie says “Since there are three of you, I will grant you all one separate wish, three total.”

First the brunette says, “I miss my boyfriend, I want to go see him and have wild sex!”

So she goes back to America and pops up in her boyfriend’s room and have wild sex.

Next the red head says, “I miss my family, I want to go back to America!” So she is back in America.

Then the blonde starts crying and crying and crying.
Finally the genie says in a very loud voice, “WHAT IS YOUR WISH?”

Then the blonde says, “I miss my friends bring them back please!”

Submitted by Admin
Edited by Curtis

A milkman was making his deliveries and found a note attached to a customers door saying “I need 45 gallons of milk. ” He knocked on the door and a beautiful dumb blond answered it.

“Is this a mistake?” the milkman asked.

“No,” she said, “I was watching a talk show and it said that bathing in milk is a good aphrodisiac.”

“Really,” replied the milkman. “Do you want that pasteurized?”

“No, up to my breasts would be fine,” she said.

A blonde woman is driving a Porsche. She sees
another blonde woman with a Porsche that has
broken down on the side of the road. She stops to
ask what’s wrong.

The owner of the broken Porsche
said, ‘I just had a look under the hood, well,
while I was driving somebody had stolen the
engine.’

The other said, ‘Oh, don’t wory, I have a spare
one in the back of my Porsche.

Q: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
A: Wave to her.

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Q. How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook?
A. She gets the pop tarts out of the toaster in one piece.
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Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
A. “Look! They spelled MACY’s wrong!”
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Q. Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?
A. Her blinker was on.
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Q. What do you call a blond skeleton in a clothes closet?
A. The 1960 hide-and-go-seek champion.
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Q. How did the blonde hurt herself while raking the leaves?
A. She fell out of the tree
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Q. How do you get a twinkle in a blonde’s eye?
A. Shine a flashlight in her ear.
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Q. Why did God give every blonde two more brain cells than a cow?
A. So they don’t moo-moo when you pull on their tits.
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Q. How do blonde brain cells die?
A. Alone.
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Why do blondes think adjustable sterring wheels are funny?
There is more head room.

A blonde was helping her mother in the kitchen by filling the salt shaker. 30 minutes later her moter asked,”why aren’t you done yet?” She replied, ” Mommy it’s so hard to get the salt through the little holes!”