Category: bill clinton

Last week a very important meeting took place among God, the Pope and Moses.

They were troubled because the President of the United States was behaving in an inappropriate manner and there were many people who saw nothing wrong in what he had done.

They decided that the only course of action left was to create an 11th Commandment to get their message across.

Now, the problem remained exactly how to word this new commandment so that it matched the other commandments in style and holy inspiration.

After great meditation and discussion they concluded: “Thou shalt not comfort thy rod with thy staff.”

Submitted by Clark Kent
Edited by Curtis

Did you hear that Hillary Clinton changed her name?

She is now known as “Sharon Peters”!

It seems Miss Lewinsky recorded some of her conversations with Clinton. In a
transcript just released Bill asked Miss Lewinsky “Do you know the difference
between Lunch and Oral Sex?”

Is Lewinsky replied, “No, I don’t”.
Bill then said “Great, let’s do lunch!”

Why was former President Clinton so interested in the events in the Middle
East?
Because he thought the Gaza Strip is a topless bar!

Q: Why is Bill Clinton’s economic plan called positively atheist?
A: Because it hasn’t got a prayer.

When women in Washington DC were asked if they would have sex with the
President, 86% said “Not again.”

Why does Hillary Clinton always climb on top?

Because Bill can only fuck up.

Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman

President Bush, over the weekend, was in Russia.

He’s there buying duty-free vodka for the twins.

The wives of four presidents and prime minister are talking together about how
a penis is called in their language. The wife of Tony Blair says in England
people call it a gentleman, because it stands up when women are entering. The
wife of Boris Yeltsin says in Russia you call it a patriot, because you never
know if it will hit you on the front or on the backside. The wife of Chirac says
in France you call it a curtain, because it goes down after the act. Well the
wife of Clinton says in the USA you call it a rumor, because it goes from mouth
to mouth.

Q: What�s the difference between Vince Foster, Ron Brown, and Monica Lewinsky?

A: Monica is the only one who took a shot in the head from Bill and lived to
tell about it.

Top ten names for Ben & Jerry’s new presidential ice cream: 1. Impeach-Mint2 Candy Pants3. Hyperactive Nuts4. Chilly Hillbilly Vanilly 5. Pantsachio6. Subpoena Colada7. Horny Bubba Crunch 8. Peppermint Fattie9. Captain Cream10. Draft-Dodging-Pot-Smoking-Intern-Nailing Raspberry Swirl

Q: How many Bill Clintons does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two — One to promise he’ll do it better than anyone else and one to
obscure the issues.