Category: bill clinton

Q: What do Bill Clinton and the Mississippi River have in common?
A: Both are all wet, wander all over the place, and are controlled by dikes.

NEW YORK — It’s a donation the Metropolitan Museum of Art doesn’t appreciate.

Officials at the famed New York museum discovered a painting of President George W. Bush hanging near an exit. The cartoon-like painting shows Bush against a background of shredded dollar bills.

A label next to the painting says it was made with acrylic, legal tender and “the artist’s semen.”

Met spokesman Harold Holzer said it’s clearly an unwelcome demonstration of self-aggrandizement.

Three similar pastings of Bush and former President Bill Clinton have been found in museums in Philadelphia and Washington.

The New York Post reported anti-terrorists police units determined the supposed semen paintings weren’t a biological hazard.

Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis

Q: What does Hillary do after she shaves her pu**y every morning?
A: Sends him to work!

Q: What does Chelsea Clinton call the sexual allegations against her father?
A: POPPYCOCK!

Q: Who is the most dangerous woman in the world?
A: Tonya Rodham Bobbitt.

Top ten names for Ben & Jerry’s new Presidential ice cream:

10. Impeach-Mint
9. Candy Pants
8. Hyperactive Nuts
7. Chilly Hillbilly Vanilla
6. Pantsachio
5. Subpoena Colada
4. Horny Bubba Crunch
3. Peppermint Fattie
2. Draft-Dodging Pot-Smoking Intern-Nailing Raspberry Swirl

And the #1 name for the new Presidential flavor…

1. Captain Cream

Q: Why did the chicken cross the Atlantic?
A: To attend D-Day celebrations.

Q: When did Clinton realize Paula Jones wasn’t a Democrat?
A: When she didn’t swallow everything he presented.

Q: What do the Republicans have that Bill Clinton wishes he had?
A: A mandate to govern.

Q: What is Bill Clinton’s favorite card game?

A: Poker.

At an Italian restaurant in Rome … the owner wants to sue Bill Clinton for not showing up.

The owner said it’s not fair that he should be kept waiting until two a.m. wondering if Bill was going to show or not.

Hillary said ‘Hey, tell me about it.’

-Jay Leno

What do Bill Gates and Bill Clinton have in common?
They’re both being investigated for their GUI applications.