16> Thou shalt not credit the Lord thy God for thy team’s victory.
15> Thou shalt not not park copies of these commandments in government buildings.
14> Thou shalt remember never to tell thy wife that her new tunic makes her ass seem large.
13> Thou shalt not use the Lord’s name in Spain.
12> Honor thy poodles.
11> Don’t be getting all up in my face about your petty wants all the damn time, you bunch of whiners.
10> Thou shalt not freely share of the MP3s.
9> 11. Goto 1;
8> Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s big-ass flat-screen TV.
7> Mock not the names of my hurricanes, lest ye be mocked yourself.
6> Thou shalt not wear Lycra if thy figure resembles the fruit of my apple tree.
5> Thou shalt pat thy belly.
Thou shalt pat thy belly again.
Okay, SIMON SAYS thou shalt pat thy belly.
Hands on thy head.
Christ, you Jews are sharp!
4> Molest not the innocent child, lest thy visage be blanched and thy nose crumble to dust.
3> Thou needest not see any movie by Mel Gibson to prove thou art devout.
2> Thou shalt not vote for false idols, like that Clay Aiken dweeb.
1> Thou shalt receive the first two stone tablets for only one shekel, then a new tablet will arrive each Sabbath. If thou wantest that tablet, do nothing….
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ] [ Copyright 2004 by Chris White ]