15. Pee Wee Herman: Duck into an adult movie theater… huh?… Oh, *heat*??… Nevermind.
14. Robert Downey, Jr. only breaks into houses with pools.
13. George Clooney: Crushed ice in the ol’ bat-codpiece.
12. Marlon Brando: Lay on the beach until a crowd gathers to pull you back into the water.
11. Tim Allen and Kelsey Grammer: Vodka Frappuccinos.
10. O.J. Simpson: Enjoy the chilly stares and icy receptions.
9. Axl Rose: Four gallons of crank and a couple hookers usually does the trick.
8. Tori Spelling: Install intracranial fan to keep air circulating.
7. Enjoying a nice palm frond fan by otherwise unemployed Pam Dawber.
6. Menage a trois with Ice Cube and Ice T.
5. Michael Jackson has another layer of skin removed.
4. Playing Frisbee with Burt Reynolds’ toupee in the shade of Dolly Parton.
3. Tom Cruise & Nicole Kidman: Lighten that heavy purse at the nearest Scientology deposit box.
2. Frank Gifford: Find hotel near the sea. Remove pants.
1. Pamela Anderson Lee: Drain saline. Replace with Slurpees.