The Top 15 Disclaimers Found on Toy Boxes (Part I)

[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ] [ Copyright 1999 by Chris White ]

15> Use as a marital aid nullifies warranty.

14> Warning: This fad will disappear in 6 weeks.

13> Uranium-236 not included.

12> As with real appliances, this thing *will* burn your careless ass.

11> Some dismemberment may occur.

10> Do not purchase this toy at all. Put it back on the shelf! NOW!! Just walk away, timid little man.

9> Harmful if swallowed with massive quantities of vodka.

8> No disrespect intended.

7> Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously.

6> Use as an actual terrorist device not recommended.

5> NOTE: The makers of “Queen Amidala’s Naboo Dream Palace” assume no responsibility for the quality of the movie which spawned it.

4> Some assimilation required. Resistance is futile.

3> Manufacturer not responsible for accidents involving EZ-Bake Oven and Suicide-Watch Barbie.

2> Caution: “Mack Daddy Ken” is anatomically exaggerated and may excite or frighten little girls and create self esteem problems in little boys.

1> Do not place Captain Viagra within 5″-7″ of an open flame.

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