You might be a redneck if…
Birds are attracted to your beard.
The diploma hanging in your den contains the words “Trucking Institute”.
Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.
Your wife’s job requires her to wear an orange vest.
You’ve ever worn a tube top to a wedding.
Bikers back down from your momma.
You were shooting pool when your kids were born.
Your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
You think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader.
Your school fight song was “Dueling Banjos”.