Politics: It all really just boils down to this:
Issue: Criminals:
Democrats: Give them a second chance.
Republicans: Give them the swift sword of death.
The poor:
Democrats: Give them some food.
Republicans: Give them the swift sword of death.
Endangered species:
Democrats: Give them protection.
Republicans: Give them the swift sword of death.
Dictators:
Democrats: Give them a way out.
Republicans: Give them the swift sword of death.
The uninsured:
Democrats: Give them health care.
Republicans: Give them the swift sword of death.
The cost:
Democrats: $9,000,000,000,000,000,000
Republicans: $29.95 (cost of one sword)