Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Lassie. I called mine Sex.
Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex.
He said “I would like to have one too” then I said “but this is a dog”
He said he didn’t care what she looked like.
Then I said “but you don’t understand I have had Sex since I was 9 years old.
He replied that I must have been quite a kid.
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me.
I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for me and my wife and a separate room for Sex.
He said every room in this place is for sex.
I said “you don’t understand” Sex keeps me awake all night and the clerk replied “me too”.
I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away.
Another contestant asked me why I was standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest.
He told me that I could have sold tickets for that “but you don’t understand, I hope to have Sex on T.V.
He called me a Show off.
When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog.
I said “Your honor I had sex before we were married”
The judge said “me too”.
Then I told him that after we were married sex left me.
He replied “me too”.
Last night Sex ran off again I spent hours looking around for him.
A cop came over and asked me “What are you doing wandering around the alley’s at 4:AM”.
I replied “I am looking for Sex”
My case comes up in court on Friday.