Fun with Unix

If you type these in from the csh (c shell): in Unix you really do get these responses.

% make love

Make: Don’t know how to make love. Stop.

% got a light?

No match.

% sleep with me

bad character

% man: Why did you get a divorce?

man:: Too many arguments.

% make ‘heads or tails of all this’

Make: Don’t know how to make heads or tails of all this. Stop.

% make sense

Make: Don’t know how to make sense. Stop.

% make mistake

Make: Don’t know how to make mistake. Stop.

% make bottle.open

Make: Don’t know how to make bottle.open. Stop.

% (-

(-: Command not found.

% make light

Make: Don’t know how to make light. Stop.

% date me

You are not superuser: date not set Thu Aug 25 15:52:30 PDT 1988

% man rear

No manual entry for rear.

% If I had a ) for every dollar Clinton spent, what would I have?

Too many )’s.

% * How would you describe Clinton

*: Ambiguous.

% %Vice-President

%Vice-President: No such job.

% ls Meese-Ethics

Meese-Ethics not found

% “How would you rate Clinton’s senility?

Unmatched “.

% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?

Missing ]. ~~

% ^How did the^sex change operation go?

Modifier failed.

% who is my match?

No match.

% set i=”Democratic_Platform”;mkdir $i;chmod 000 $i;ls $i

Democratic_Platform unreadable

% awk “Polly, the ship is sinking”

awk: syntax error near line 1

awk: bailing out near line 1

% ‘thou shalt not commit adultery’

thou shalt not commit adultery: Command not found.

Spread the love

Leave a Reply