“Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.” — On a
bottle of shampoo for dogs.
“Do not use while sleeping.” — On a hair dryer.
“Do not light in face. Do not expose to flame.” — On a lighter.
“Do not eat.” — On a slip of paper in a stereo box, referring to the
styrofoam packing.
“Access hole only — not intended for use in lifting box.” — On the sides
of a shipping carton, just above cut-out openings which one would assume
were handholds.
“Warning: May cause drowsiness.” — On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of
sleeping pills.
“Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.” — Stamped on the metal
barrel of a .22 calibre rifle.
“Turn off motor before using this product.” — On the packaging for a
chain saw file, used to sharpen the cutting teeth on the chain.
“Not to be used as a personal flotation device.” — On a 6×10 inch
inflatable picture frame.
“Do not put in mouth.” — On a box of bottle rockets.
“Please remove before driving.” — On the back of a cardboard windshield
(for keeping the car from getting too hot when parked).
“Remove plastic before eating.” — On the wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack.
“Do not drive cars in ocean.” — In small print at the bottom of the
screen during a car commercial which shows a car in the ocean.
“Not dishwasher safe.” — On a remote control for a TV.
“For lifting purposes only.” — On the box for a car jack.
“Do not put lit candles on phone.” — On the instructions for a cordless
phone.
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Signs and Notices:
“No stopping or standing.” — A sign at a bus stop.
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Safety Procedures:
“Take care: new non-slip surface.” — On a sign in front of a newly
renovated ramp that led to the entrance of a building.
“In case of flood, proceed uphill. In case of flash flood, proceed uphill
quickly.” — One of the emergency safety procedures at a summer camp.