Dont miss these ones!”

Yo mama is so fat…

she walked in front of the tv and i missed a two hour movie

every time she turns around its her birthday

the back of her neck looks like a pack of hotdogs

i swerved around her and ran out of fuel

people run around her for marathon practise

i roll over 3 times and im still on the bitch

the last time she saw 90210 was on the scales

when she got on the scales it said ‘one at a time please’

when she tried again it said ‘no live stock please’

she gets a group discount at weight watchers

when she tried sunbaking, greenies started jumping around her yelling ‘save the whale, save the whale’

shes got more rolls than a bakery

her belt size is equator

she has her own gravity pull

when a bulldozer ran in to her she said ‘ who threw that pebble?’

YO MAMAS so stupid…

she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

it takes her 3 mins to cook 2 min noodles

YO MAMAS so poor…

when she was kickin a can down the street and i asked ‘what ya doin?’ she said ‘movin house’

she hangs the toilet paper out to dry

when i was at her place i asked ‘wheres the toilet?’ she said ‘pick a corner’

when i was at her place i asked ‘whats for dinner?’ she stuck her foot on the table and said ‘corn and jam’

YO MAMAS so old…

when she reads the bible she reminices.