Category: signs of our times

On a store front in Florida: “Your one stop shop! Beer ammo and liquor. Drive through open 24 hours!” A speed limit sign on Long Beach Island, New Jersey: “Smile, You’re on Radar!” Seen in a State Park in California: “Weather Station (A large sign with a Rock hanging on a rope) Check the Rock. If it’s wet, it’s raining. If it’s moving, it’s windy. If you can’t see it, it’s foggy. If rock is gone, it’s a tornado.”Sign in a Laundromat AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT Sign in a London department store: BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

At a number of military bases: “Restricted to unauthorized personnel.”On a display of “I love you only” Valentine cards: “Now available in multi-packs.”In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: “Don’t kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work.”In a funeral parlor: “Ask about our layaway plan.”In a clothing store: “Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks.”

Sign in a Swiss mountain inn: “Special today — no ice cream.” Sign in a Copenhagen airline ticket office: “We take your bags and send them in all directions.” Sign on the door of a Moscow hotel room: “If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.” Sign in a Norwegian cocktail lounge: “Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.” Sign in the office of a Roman doctor: “Specialist in women and other diseases.”

Sign in a science teacher’s room: “If it moves, it’s biology. If it stinks, it’s chemistry. If it doesn’t work, it’s physics.”Sign in butchers window: “Pleased to meat you.” Sign on auto body shop: “May we have the next dents?” Sign at the dry cleaner’s window: “Drop your pants here.” Sign on a parking space at a garden nursery: “Reserved for plant manager.”

Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan:

Stop: Drive Sideways.

On a banner on the side of the road, just south of Indianapolis:

“Used cows for Sale!”

In a Paris hotel elevator:

Please leave your values at the front desk.

On G. Altman’s Chicken:

“Been Roasting Since 1957”

Will that be
regular, or extra crispy?

Advertisement for lawn sprinkler system:

“Dew it yourself.”

In a Zurich hotel:

Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests
of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be
used for this purpose.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency:

Take one of our horse-driven city
tours — we guarantee no miscarriages.

On a New York convalescent home:

“For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church.”