Category: riddles

There’s a fire in your house and all you have is a gun and a knife. What
do you do?

Shoot down the steps and cut around the corner.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs and a woman with no armsand no legs on a grill?A: Frank and PattyQ: What do you call a leper in a hot tub?A: Stu (Stew)Q: Why did they stop the leper hockey game?A: There was a face-off in the corner.Q: Why did they stop the leper poker game?A: Someone threw down their hand.

Why was the washing machine laughing?

It was taking the piss out of the knickers.

Who won the mummy race?

It was dead even!

Q: What do you call a bull that always sleeps?

A: A bulldozer.

Q: What is a golfer’s favorite drink?

A: Tea (tee).

Q: What pitcher loves ice cream?

A: David Cone

Q: What was the defensive lineman’s favorite instrument?

A: Sacks-ophone( saxophone)

Q: What is the difference between a baseball and Prince Charles?

A: A baseball is thrown into the air. Prince Charles is heir to the
throne.

What goes, “Ha! Ha! Ha! Plop?”

A man laughing his head off.

What is red, furry and lives in a jar?

Pickle Me Elmo.

Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 8 (ate) 9.

Here is a little riddle for you:

What is long,
hard,
has a hole in one end,
is really fuzzy on the other end, and
when you place it in your mouth and excite it
white stuff comes from it.

Answer: A Toothbrush

What is long, very hard, and full of seamen?

A submarine. What were you thinking of?

What is green and has four wheels?

– Grass. (I lied about the wheels.)

Why didn’t the kitten cross the road?

Because he was a scaredy cat.