Category: rednecks

what do you call and orgy for rednecks?
a family runion

Q. What would you call a Redneck who has successfully completed the 3rd grade?A. Smart!

You go to the family reunion to pick up women.Your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.You can’t tell what color your car is because of the dirt.

Your junior-senior prom had a day-care center

If your car garage is bigger than your house then you have to be a redneck

You migt be a Redneck if the only fun you can have is by burning stuff with spraypaint.

You’re a redneck if…. Your favorite Christmas present was a painting on
black velvet.

Your wedding was held in the delivery room.Your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener.Your wife’s hairdo attracts bees.

After having their 10th child, an Arkansas couple decided that that was enough. So the husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn’t want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem. The doctor told the man that he was to go home, get a cherry bomb, put it in a can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

The Arky said to the doctor “I may not be the smartest man, but I don’t see how putting a cherry bomb in a can next to my ear is going to help me.”

So the couple drove to Missouri to get a second opinion. The doctor was just about to tell them about the procedure for a vasectomy when he noticed they were from Arkansas. This doctor also told the man to go home and get a cherry bomb, place it in a tin can, hold it next to his ear and count to 10.

Figuring that both doctors couldn’t be wrong, the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count, “1, 2, 3, 4, 5…” at which point he paused, placed the can between his legs and resumed counting on his other hand.

You might be a redneck if…Your `huntin dawg’ cost more than the truck you drive him around in. You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top. Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds. You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.You have the taxidermist’s number on speed-dial. You own more cowboy boots than sneakers. You’ve been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars. You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.You just bought an 8-track player to put in your car. There are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.

There were 3 boys one called shit the another called fuck and the 3rd one called manners, they all went for a bike ride one day and shit fell off his bike, fuck went to the police station to get help as it was very close and manners went to help shit who had fallen off his bike, fuck got into the police station and a police man said whats your name “fuck” police man asks again whats your name “fuck” where are your manners? “Up the road picking up shit”

You’re a redneck if …. Anyone in your family died right after saying “Hey,
Y’all watch this!”.