Category: politicians

A squad of American soldiers was patrolling along the Iraqi
border. To their surprise, they found the badly mangled dead
body of an Iraqi soldier in a ditch along the road. A short
distance up the road, they found a badly mangled American
soldier in a ditch on the other side of the road, who was still
barely alive. They ran to him, cradled his blood-covered head
and asked him what had happened.

“Well,” he whispered, “I was walking down this road, armed to
the teeth. I came across this heavily armed Iraqi border guard.
I looked him right in the eye and shouted, ‘Saddam Hussein is an
unprincipled, lying piece of trash!’ He looked me right in the
eye and shouted back, ‘Bill Clinton is an unprincipled, lying
piece of trash too!’ We were standing there shaking hands when
the truck hit us.”

Three midgets who really want to be in the Guiness Book of World
Records decide that they can come up with “something” that would
qualify them for submission into the book. They call up the
judging panel and arrange an appointment.

The first midget walks into the judging room and tells the
panel, “I believe I have the smallest hands in the world!” The
judges examine him and confer. Upon making their decision, the
midget exits the room. As he enters the waiting area, he tells
his friends, “I made it! I have the smallest hands in the WORLD!”

The second midget walks into the judging room and tells the
panel, “I have the smallest feet in the world!” The judges
examine his feet and confer. Upon making their decision, the
midget exits the room. As he enters the waiting room, he tells
his friends, “I made it! I have the smallest feet in the WORLD!”

The third midget walks into the judging room and tells the
panel, “Well, I don’t have the smallest hands or feet in the
world, but I think I do have something that might qualify!” With
that he whips out his tiny dick and shows the judges. They
chuckle, but examine him and confer. Upon making their decision,
the midget exits the room. As he enters the waiting area, he
shakes his head back and forth, hanging his head low. “Did you
get in the book?” asks the first midget. “No,” the third midget
says sadly, “but I sure would like to know who that Bill Clinton
fucker is.”

once upun a time……

A nice little blonde asian girl, becaome FAT!

EMILY CHO

An Anagram, as you all know, is a word or phrase made by
transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or
phrase.

PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA

It can be rearranged (with no letters left over, and using each
letter only once into: TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

Bush went to Afganistan to discuss peace agreements. While he
was in the Room The Taliban leader presses a button and a Fist
comes out and puches him. He begans to laugh and Bush is
annoyed. Then as the began talking he presses another button and
a fist comes out and punches his balls. This really gets on his
nerves so he leaves. The talaban leader is laughing his ass off.
Two months latter Bush calls for a peace agreement woth
Afganistans leader. AS they are in the oval office Bush presses
a button and the Taliban leader ducks but nothing happend Bush
is laughing his head off. when the began talking again push
presses the button again and the T leader covers his balls
nothing happend bush is laughing so hard he is read. The T
leader says I’m going back to Afganistan Bush replies what
afganistan

Winston Churchill was a quite a character. Here, for your
enjoyment, is a bit of a description of him:

(1) Seeing how rude Churchill was to his wife (and everyone
else), a lady once told him, “Winston, if I was your wife, I
would poison your tea.” Churchill replied, “And madame, if I was
your husband, I would drink it.” Ouch.

(2) At a dinner a party, a (different) lady thought Churchil had
had a bit too much to drink, and told him so: “Winston, you are
drunk.” Churchill’s answer: “And madame, you are ugly. The
difference is, in the morning, I will be sober.” Ouch Ouch.

(3 and final) The famous playwright George Bernard Shaw, once
wrote a letter to Churchill along these lines: “…I would be
delighted if you could attend the first performance of my new
play…You may bring a friend, if you have one.” Churchill was
not going to take that sitting down; his reply: “I apologize
that I cannot attend the first performance of your play, but I
will be happy to attend the second performance, if you have one.”

What do you call a horny redneck who can’t tell the truth?

Bill Clinton.

This is the FBI summary of a conversation that took place this
week between president Clinton and Ashley, a brand new intern in
the White House:

Ashley walked into the white house for her first day of her
internship and was greeted by the President. After a short tour
of the White House the President asked “how would you like to
see the Presidential clock?”

Ashley looked trouble and said “I don’t know……….MR.
President. I have heard some pretty bad things about you. I
don’t think that would be a good idea.”

“Nonsense,” said the President, “its just a clock.” Ashley
agreed and the president lead her into the oval office where
they were alone. As he closed the door he dropped his pants and
pulled out his cock.

Ashley gasped. “Oh! That’s not the Presidential
clock……that’s the Presidential…cock!” to which the
president responded:

“Ashley honey, you put a face and two hands on it and its a
clock….”

Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel
when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel
and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel’s butt, just then a
guy comes over and says, “What are you doing?”

Osama replies, “About 2 miles back I heard someone say, ‘Hey,
look at the two assholes on that camel.'”

Where is the best place to meet Bill Clinton and why?

The oval office because he can’t corner you.

What is that good about Taliban airlines ?
They take you straight to your office?

There was an English man, a Scotish man and Tony Bliar. They
were all playing football when the Scotish was in goal, the
English man shot at the goal and the Scotish man who was nowhere
near the ball just stuck out one hand and caught the ball. The
English man was amazed, ” How did you do it?” he asked.” I must
have the biggest hands in the world” he replied. So they carried
on playing and teh English man kicked the baal so hard it flew
out of the park. The Scotish man ” how did you do that?”, “
well I must have the biggest feet in the world” he repied. Then
when the English man tried to do it agian Tony Blair got in the
way and the English kicked right into his nuts and he did not
react, so the English man asks “why didn’t you react”. and Tony
says ” I must have the smallest nuts in the world”. So they went
into a shop to check the Guinnes Book of records. The Engish man
comes out saying “Yes I have the biggest feet in the world”. The
Scotish man comes out saying ” yes I have the biggest hands in
the world “. Then Tony comes out saying ” now were’s that
President Bush”