Category: one liners

How can I miss you if you won’t go away?

If tennis players get tennis elbow, what do gynecologists get?

Tunnel vision!

Submitted by Curtis
Eduted by yisman

If you can read this,

Than I can step on my brakes,

And I can sue you!

My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

Submitted by Curtis
Edited Calamjo

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Is a detective story about frogs a “croak and dagger” story?

if you want to kiss your hunny but her nose is runny you may think it’s funny but it’s snot!

Q: Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony?
A. She is the one who can eat the last donut!

If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height,
what would happen?

Why is it more important for women to be pretty rather than smart?

Because men can see better than the they can think.

Submitted by calamjo
Edited by Glaci

I can go for more than seven days without sleep…
so it’s a good thing I sleep nights.

There are two rules for success in life:

Rule 1: Don’t tell people everything you know.