Category: light bulbs

Q: How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: None, they only screw the poor.

Q: How many one-armed people does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: Only one, as long as he kept the till receipt.

How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
None… because you can program around anything!

Q: How many George Smillivitches does it take to change a lightbulb?A: None, becouse tough girls aren’t afraid of the dark.

Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: I don’t know, but make my stipend tax-free, give my advisor a $100,000 grant of the taxpayer’s money, and I’m sure he can tell me how to do the work for him so he can take the credit for answering this incredibly vital question.

Q: How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: None. “It’s not a bug, it’s a feature.”

Q: How many procrastinators does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: One–but he has to wait until the light is better.

Q: How many Douglas Wilders does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: I don’t know, he can’t decide if he is going to screw a lightbulb in or not!

Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulb?A: The probability that the light bulb will actually be changed in any time interval is independent of how long you’ve been waiting.

Q: How many copyeditors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: None. “I’m not changing a thing”

Q: How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: Five. One to change it, and four to stand around going “Huh ! I could’ve done that !”

Q: How many senior citizens does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: One, but she pays a telemarketer $2000 for the new bulb.