Category: light bulbs

How many college students does it take to change a light bulb?

Will this question come up on a test?

Q: How many members of the P.L.O. does it take to change a light bulb?A: 45 – One to drive the car, four to shoot the president of Sylvania’s bodyguards, three to kidnap the president of Sylvania, five to think up the ransom demands, ten to paste up the ransom note, eight to cut little eye-holes in the cloth sacks, one to drive a truck with 2000 kilos of dynamite into the American embassy, one to claim responsibility for the bombing, and twelve to commandeer a building with working lights.

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a Soviet emigre?A: One, if you aim well.

Q: How many egotists does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: One. He holds onto the lightbulb, and waits for the world to revolve around him.

Q: How many science fiction writers does it take to change a lightbulb?A: Two. One to screw in the light bulb, and one to say, “In 1876, Jules Verne had the first intimations that electrostatic power was a viable energy alternative. Hitherto, the only sources …”

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

Joke found on http://www.randomjoke.com

How many Polacks does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but you need 6000 Russian troops in case he goes
on strike!

Q: How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: Two–one to do it and one to steady the chandelier.

Q: How many veterinarians does it take to change a light bulb?A: Three. One to change the bulb and two more to complain that an MD makes ten times as much for the same procedure!!

Q: How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?A: None. The darkness will cause the light bulb to change by itself.Note: “Supply-siders” were the force behind Reagan’s early reforms, and their economic theories were just like those of Thatcher (only the Thatcherites were more extreme). They believed that if they shifted the focus of government economic policy to stimulating supply rather than demand, the business cycle would be stopped at an agreeable point and inflation would be permanently whipped. Obviously, it didn’t quite work out that way.)

Q: How many kindergarden kids does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, two, three… Mummy! can I use my toes?

Q: How many Tory MP’s does it take to change a light bulb?A: I’m sorry I can’t tell you that, the light bulb changing service has been privatised and the information you require is commercially sensitive.