Category: light bulbs

Q: How many roadies does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: None. “I don’t do lights. That’s the light crew’s job.”

Q: How many country & western singers does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love she is with the new one, and one to go “Yeeeee-Hah !” and throw his hat in the air.

Q: How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: 22, one to screw it in, 21 to shoot the bulb.

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.

Q: How many Macintosh engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: None – it has to be done by a local authorized dealer.

How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to turn it in and four to form a support group and blame the whole thing on men in the first place.

Q: How many nihilists does it take to change a light bulb?A: There is nothing to change.

Q: How many Microsoft employees does it take to change a lightbulb?A: None. They just write it up as a new and useful feature.

Q: How many presidential candidates does it take to change a lightbulb ?A: Less and less all the time.

Q: How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: Two-one to get murdered under the burnt-out bulb and the other to replace it after the ensuing publicity.

Q: How many U.S fighter pilots does it take to change a lightbulb?A: No! You mean it was one of ours?!Notes : Topical to the shooting down of two allied helicopters over Iraq.