Category: definitions

Defunct Operating System

Slowpoke

How turtles make love.

Network – Scoop’n up a big fish before it breaks the line.Online – Where to stay when taking the sobriety test.Rom – Where the pope lives.

Bachelor of Science

One who has mastered the science of remaining a bachelor.

Freudian Slip (noun)

A Freudian Slip is when you intend to say one
thing but instead say your mother.

Gay Abandon

Homosexual repellent perfume.

A device that permits
us to lose several keys at one time.

Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the firewood.Hard Drive: Getting’ home in the winter season.Prompt: What you wish the mail was in the winter.

A dead Scotsman.

An event at which the minutes are kept and the
hours are lost.

Real Estate Definitions

Charming

Tiny. Snow White might fit, but five of the dwarfs would have
to find their own place. See “Cute,” “Enchanting,” and “Good Starter Home.”

Much Potential

Grim. Steer clear unless you have a lot of money and
believe your blind dates really did have nice personalities.

Unique City Home

Used to be a warehouse.

Hi-Tech/Contemporary

Lots of steel shelving with little holes – the
kind your dad used to store tools on in the basement.

Daring Design

Still a warehouse

Completely Updated

Avocado dishwasher and harvest gold carpeting
or vice versa.

Sophisticated

Black walls and no windows. See “Architect’s Delight.”

One-Of-A-Kind

Ugly as sin.

Brilliant Concept

Do you really need a two-story live oak in your
30-foot sky dome? See “Makes Dramatic Statement.”

Upper Bracket

If you have to ask…

You’ll Love It

No, you won’t.

Must See To Believe

An absolutely accurate statement.

Microwave Oven (noun)

Space-age kitchen appliance that uses the principle
of radar to locate and immediately destroy any food
placed within the cooking compartment.