Category: business

When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear. When there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

Programming errors which would normally require one day to find will take five days when the programmer is in a hurry.

What happens when people of different occupations get old.- Old limbo dancers never die, they just go under.- Old mathematicians never die, they just disintegrate.- Old milkmaids never die, they just lose their whey.- Old ministers never die, they just get put out to pastor…

Goebel’s Law Of Computer Support: Troubleshooting a computer over the telephone is like having sex through a hole in a board fence. It can be done, but it is neither easy nor pleasant.

If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t there more happy people?

Hubbard’s Law: Don’t take life too seriously; you won’t get out of it alive.

I hate when people say supposevly. What the hell is supposevly? Do you mean supposedly? Also, do you know how stupid you sound when you say, “I could care less!”? Saying this means that you do care, and that it is possible for you to care less. What you mean to say is, “I could NOT care less!”. Just a couple quick grammar lessons for idiots.

If I your opinion, I’ll ask you to fill out the necessary form.

Harrisberger’s Fourth Law of the Lab: Experience is directly proportional to the amount of equipment ruined.

If anything is used to its full potential, it will break.

How careers end… Holy people are disgraced. Pastry chefs are deserted. Perfume makers are dissented. Butterfly collectors are debugged.

If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.