Category: business

If you do something right once, someone will ask you to do it again.

The Aquinas Axiom: What the gods get away with, the cows don’t.

Only a fool can reproduce another fool’s work.

Free time which unexpectedly becomes available will be wasted.

Excerpts from actual letters sent to landlordsOur kitchen floor is very damp, we have two children and would like a third, so will you please send someone to do something about it. Will you please send a man to look at my water? It is a funny color and not fit to drink. Would you please send a man to repair my downspout? I am an old-age pensioner and need it straight away.

No real problem has a solution.

May’s Law: The quality of correlation is inversely proportional to the density of control. (The fewer the data points, the smoother the curves.)

Boyle’s Laws: (1) The success of any venture will be helped by prayer, even in the wrong denomination. (2) When things are going well, someone will inevitably experiment detrimentally. (3) The deficiency will never show itself during the dry runs. (4) Information travels more surely to those with a lessor need to know. (5) An original idea can never emerge from committee in the original. (6) When the product is destined to fail, the delivery system will perform perfectly. (7) The crucial memorandum will be snared in the out-basket by the paper clip of the overlying correspondence and go to file. (8) Success can be insured only by devising a defense against failure of the contingency plan. (9) Performance is directly affected by the perversity of inanimate objects. (10) If not controlled, work will to the competent man until he submerges. (11) The lagging activity in a project will invariably be found in the area where the highest overtime rates lie waiting. (12) Talent in staff work or sales will recurringly be interrupted as managerial ability. (13) The “think positive” leader tends to listen to his subordinates’ premonitions only during the postmortems. (14) Clearly stated instructions will consistently produce multiple interpretations. (15) On successive charts of the same organization the number of boxes will never decrease. – Charles P. Boyle, Goddard Space Flight Center, NASA

A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library.

Beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes clear to the bone.

What are the 3 advantages of having a #50 note tattoed on 2 ur penis
1 u can play with ur money

2 u can watch ur money grow

3 ur wife can blow as much money as she wants!

All the world is a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.