Category: bush

Q: What did Bush say when asked about the rising deficit?
A: Don’t worry; I’m firmly committed to keeping it under a gazillion.

George Bush on his upbringing- “Our parents were of Midwestern stock and very
strict. They didn’t want rich and us to grow up to be spoiled. If we left our
tennis racquets in the rain, we were punished.”
(Not a real quote)

President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar.
A guy walks in and asks the barman, “Isn’t that Bush and Powell sitting over
there?”
The barman says, “Yep, that’s them.”
So the guy walks over and says, “Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys
doing in here?”
Bush says, “We’re planning WW III.”
And the guy says, “Really? What’s going to happen?”
Bush says, “Well, we’re going to kill 140 million Iraqis this time and one
bicycle repairman.”
The guy exclaimed, “A bicycle repairman? Why kill a bicycle repairman?”
Bush turns to Powell, punches him on the shoulder and says, “See, smart ass?!
I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis!”

Now that more is being revealed about poor intelligence getting us into Iraq, you may ask, why did we really go?

Perhaps this review of Bush’s words will help.

Note: Our “Send this Joke to A Friend” email thingy doesn’t transmit pictures. But if you see this in email, you can click on the link above!

Q: Why did George W. Bush used to drink so much?
A: He was hoping that Bud would make him Wiser.

“The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history. I mean in this
century’s history. But we all lived in this century. I didn’t live in this
century.” GW Bush

Q: How do you know if George W. Bush personally sent you a fax?
A: There’s a stamp on it.

One day mr. bush sleeping with mr. powel,
suddenly he ask powel hay…powel bring one girl i wanna f***…after a long
time my dick is standing. its hard…off…
its mine…u r holding mine sir.replys powel.

Why did bin ladian run from his wife?
Cause when she lifted up her dress he saw bush!

Q: What do you call George W. Bush in a leather jacket?
A: Rebel without a clue!

President George H.W. and Barbara Bush: “I wish it was Jeb.”
Jeb Bush: “I wish it was me.”
Al Gore: “I wish it was me.”
Bill Clinton: “I wish it was me.”
Hillary Clinton: “I wish it was me.”
Dick Cheney: “It is me!”
George W. “What? The speech? You mean the one about the tax cut? The other
one? Where am I?”
Democrats: “How could the Republicans be so stupid?”
Stupid Republicans: “Why weren’t the Democrats bi-partisan enough to have
conceded the election in July? This speaks ill of them.”
Nader supporters: “He’s just like Gore… only worse.”
Nader: “I can’t tell the difference. Oh, wait! Stop there! These contacts are
much better. There! There’s the difference! Thanks, doc!”
Tipper: “I wish Al wasn’t so bald.”
Buchanan: “A Texan president! They’re letting all of the foreigners in!”
Colin Powell: “Secretary of State is almost like being president. Look at the
influence of Christopher Warren! Look at it!”
Gerald Ford: “And they called me ‘stupid!'”
President Reagan: “Nancy, he’s Bonzo’s son, right?”
Gorbachev, Jr.: “Now is the time to strike!”
This really makes me wish I was a talented comic strip maker.

Last winter, George W. Bush wanted to go ice fishing, so after gathering up
all of the equipment, he headed toward the nearest frozen lake. After getting
comfy on his stool, he started to cut a circular hole in the ice.
Then from the heavens, a voice boomed, ”THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”
Startled, George moved further down the ice, poured a thermos of hot chocolate
and started to cut yet another hole in the ice.
The voice boomed, ”THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”
This time, he was quite scared, so George moved to the far end of the ice and
started another hole.
Once again the voice said, ”THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”
The very scared, very shook up, “leader of the free world” raised his head and
trembled, ”Is that you, Lord?”
The voice answered, ”NO. IT IS THE MANAGER OF THE ICE RINK.”