Category: blacks

What did God say when he saw the first black person?

Damnit…I burnt one!

A white guy is walking along a beach when he comes cross a lamp
partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it
a rub. Two genies appear and they tell him that he has been
granted three wishes.

The guy makes his three wishes and the genies disappear. The
next thing the guy knows, he’s in a bedroom in a mansion
surrounded by fifty beautiful women. He makes love to all of
them and begins to explore the house. He feels something soft
under his feet. He looks down and the whole floor is covered
with $100 bills.

Suddenly, there’s a knock at the door. He answers the door and
standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits.
They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a
limb and hang him by the neck until he is dead. The Klansmen
walk off.

As they are walking away they remove their hoods. It’s the two
genies. One genie says to the other one, “Hey, I can understand
the first wish of having all these beautiful women in a big
mansion to make love to. I can also understand wanting to be a
millionaire. But to be hung like a black man is beyond me!”

One day this bartender is cleaning off the bar when a black guy
walks into the bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender
looks up and says:
“Where did ya get that?”
The parrot says, “AFRICA”.

How To Tell a Negro Is Stealing Your T.V.

1. you see a floating t.v.
2. You only see two eyes moving.
3. you hear a “damn dog dat shit looks exspencive”.

What do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill?

A Mudslide.

There was a black guy and a white guy. They were debating over
whether god was white or black. The white guy said that there
was only one way to find out and that is to pray. So they go up
on a hill and they pray, and pray, and pray. Finally they here a
voice say, “I am what I am.” The white guy jumps up, and says,
“AHA I told you he was white.” The black guy jumps up and says,
“What do you mean? That didn’t prove anything.” “Yes it did,
Because if he was black he would’ve said I is what I is.”

Last Holloween, a black girl and her brother wanted to go trick
or treating. The boy went as Superman and she went as Princess
Di. Their parents took one look at them and said, “Have you ever
seen a black Superman or a black Princess Di?”

So, they went back to their room to change. When they came back
out, the boy was wearing a blue shirt and a diaper like Tommy
Pickles (a cartoon), and the girl was wearing a blonde wig and a
white dress (Marylynn Monroe). Again the parents yelled at them.

The last time they came downstair they were naked. The parents
were speechless. The girl said, “We’re Hershey’s Kisses! Im
plain, he got nuts!”

A black couple were invited to a costume party. The man told the
women to go out and get his costume.

When he came home, he saw the costume that his wife had bought
laid out on the bed. It was a superman costume. Upon seeing this
he yelled to his wife, “Superman? A superman comstume? Have you
ever heard of a black superman? Go back and get me a new
costume!” A little aggrivated, she goes to get his costume.

The next day the man returns home and sees his new costume on
the bed. It was a batman costume. Apon seeing this, he yelled to
his wife, “A batman costume? Have you ever heard of a black
batman? Go and get me a new costume!” The wife, being furious,
goes to get a new costume.

The husband returns home the next day to find a white belt, some
white polka-spots, and a 2×4 of wood.

The husband, seeing this yells to his wife, “What are these
for?” The wife replies, “Well, you can just wear the belt and be
an oreo. If you don’t like that then put on the polka-dots and
go as a domino. And if you still don’t like that, than shove the
2×4 up your butt and go as a fudgesickle!”

One day a zebra went a lion, the king of the jungled, and asked,
“Am I black with white stripes or white with black stipes.” The
lion replied, “I don’t know. Go ask God.”

So the zebra went to ask God. God said, “You are what you are.”

The zebra went back and told the lion what god said. The lion
said, “You must be white with black stripes.” “Why”, asked the
zebra. The lion replied, “Because if you were black with white
stripes God would of said ‘you is what you is.'”

One day a Black guy that was trying to steal a bank, dies in a
shootput with the cops. So when he goes up to heaven, he’s
waiting in line to tell St.Peter his name, so finally he gets up
there, and St. Peter asks him “Your name, kind sir,” and the
black guy says “Leonardo DiCaprio.” St.Peter confused says, “ok
hold on a sec.” And he goes to his office, picks up the phone
and calls God. When god picks up the phone, St.Peter says “God,
did the Titanic sink or burn?”

Q: Why don’t black people play hockey?

A: Because there’s a bunch of white guys skating around with
mask on, chasing a black hockey puck with sticks.

A guy walks into a broffle with $500 and asks for the
biggest, fattest black lady they had . So they gave him the
cleaner , after that they went up to a room , The guy says “Take
off your clothes and lie on the bed” so the cleaner goes ahead
and takes her clothes of and lies on the bed , the guy asks her
while she’s lying down to spread her pussy open as far as she
can , so she does excatly what he says to . She then gets to the
point where she can’t spread it open any more and it’s spread as
far as it can go , so the man says ” hold it right there keep
your pussy as it is ” the man stays there and looks at her pussy
for the next few minutes then tells the lady to leave. As she
walks out the door then the bar tender walks in and says ” are
you out of your mind you just wasted $500 bucks and you didn’t
even get to fuck her god your a dickhead then the other man
replies with ” nah mate i didn’t waste any of my money its just
that earlier today i bought a big black sofa and i just wanted
to see what pink pillows would look like on my new lounge”.

GET IT HAHAHAHAHAHA