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One day, a man came home to find his wife hysterically crying.
He said, “Honey, whats the matter?” She said, “Oh it was
terrible. This black man broke in the house. He raped me, made
me suck his cock and made me sing the star spangled banner”.
“That’s terrible,” the man replied. “I know. I don’t know how to
sing.”
A Duck Walks into a bar and asks the bar tender “Do you have any
grapes”?
The bar tender says “No come back tommorow.”
The next day the duck goes into the bar and asks the maneger,
“Do you have and grapes?
The maneger says “No” “And if you come back again i’m goin to
staple your feet to the floor!!”,
Next day he goes back and says
“You got any staples”?
The bar tender says
“No.”
So he says
“Got any grapes?”
What do you call a black mermaid???
A carp with tits
One day there was this guy who was walking down his back
alley when he tripped over something, he looked back and it
turned out to be a magic lamp. So he picked up the lamp and
started cleaning it, when a Genie came out. The genie said, “I
will grant you three wishes.” So the man said,”Ok, I wish I had
all the money in the world.” so his wish came true. Then he
wished that he can have all the pretty woman in the world, that
wish also came true. Then he said,” I wish I can be hung like a
black guy.” So one day he was in his house enjoying his
beautiful woman an his money, when the doorbell rang and he went
to answer it. Surprisingly here were two guys dressed like the
KKK, so they took him outside and hung him from a tree.
There is a new weapon store in town, and the news is spreading
fast. People say that you can find any weapon you want there.
So Jack, that is a nigger, once was walking and he saw the
store. “People say it is so amazing, i will check it out”,he
said to himself.
So there goes Jack in the store. He goes and talks to the first
salesman he sees, “Excuse me”.
“Excuse you? Why should I? Get out of here.” the salesman
replied in a very rude tone.
“But…” Jack insisted.
“But nothing, get the fuck out of here or I will call the
security and you will be kicked out.”
So Jack went out, enfuriated.
“What happened” asked Jack’s white friend, Tomas, that was
going inthe store andsaw his friend walking out with a mean look.
“You are going in there?” Jack asked
“Yeah,” Tom replied “Why?”
“The salesman are very rude,” it is no good”.
And then Jack rushed away.
But Tom got curious and wanted to go see what got Jack so mad.
The store had such a good reputation. So he decided to check it
out.
“Good morning Sir” said the salesman as Tom came in, “My name
is Oliver, what can I do for you?”
“Thanks” said Tom “I’m just looking”.
“Make yourself confortable, we have any thing you may be
looking for.”
And it went on. The salesman was very pleasant. And Tom even
became friends with him. The service was exellent. He was even
asked if he wanted a cup of water. And Tom was about to go, when
he decided to ask his last question.
“Excuse me” he said.
“Yes, Tom” the salesman replied with a big smile.
“What to you have against niggers?”
The salesman face got just a bit serious but then he replied.
“Well, against niggers we have this riffle, he isn’t so
powerfull, but the aim is terrific. If you want power, there is
the Shotgun 2000, but the bullets are hard to buy. We also have
the….”
Wuz de nite befo Crimmus;
An’ all ower de hood;
ereybody wuz’ sleepin’;
Dey wuz sleepin’ good.
We hunged up our stockings;
An hoped like de’ heck;
That ol Sanna Clause;
Be bringin’ our check.
All o’de fambily;
Wuz layin in de beds;
While Ripple and Thunderbird;
Dance tru’ dey heads.
I passed out inna’ flo;
Right nex to my Maw;
When I heard sech a fuss;
I thunk: “It mus be de law!!!”
I looked out thru de bars;
What covered my doe;
‘spectin’ de sheriff;
Wif a warrent fo sho.
And what did I see;
I said, “Lawd look at dat!!”
Ther’ wuz a huge watermellon;
Pulled by giant warf rats!!
Now ober all de years;
Santa Clause, he be white;
But looks liken us bros;
Gets a black Sanna dis nite.
Faster dan a Po’lees car;
My home boy he came;
He whupped on dem warf rats;
An’ called dem by name!
On Leroy, on ‘Lonzo ;
And on Willie Lee;
On Saphire, on Chenequa;
Dey wuz a site to see!!
As he landed dat watta’ mellon;
Out der in da skreet;
I knowed it was fo’ sho’;
Da damndest site I ebber did see.
He didn’t go down no chimbley;
He picked da’ lock on my doe;
An’ I sez to myself;
“Shit!! He done dis befoe!!!”
He had dis big bag;
Full of prezents I ‘xpect;
Wid Air Jordans and fake gold;
To wear roun’ my neck.
But he left no good prezents;
Jus started stealing my shit;
Got my drugs, got my guns,
Even got my burglar’s kit!!
Wit my stuff in de bag;
Out da window he flewed;
I woudda’ tried to catched him;
But he stoled my ‘nife too!!
He jumped on dat wadda’ mellon;
an’ whipped out a switch;
He wuz gone in a seccon’;
Dat son of a bitch!!
Next year I be hopin’:
Anutha Sanna we git;
Cuz’ diz here Sanna Clause;
Jus’ ain’t werf a shit!!!
The little black boy went into the kitchen, his mother was
making fried chicken. He put his hand in the flour and patted it
one his face. He said, “Look mom I’m a white boy.” She slapped
him in the face and told him to go tell his father what he did.
He said, “Look dad I’m a white boy.” His father slapped him told
him to go tell his grandmother what he has done.
Now his grandmother slapped him and told him to go see his
mother. He went back into the kitchen and his mother asked if he
had learned anything from this. He said yes I’ve only been white
for 5 min and I already hate nig—-.
Why are inner city people good at basketball?
Cause They already know how to Shoot, steal, and run.
what do u not want to call a black person it begins with a n and
ends with a r
neighbor cuz u don’t want them to steal ne thing
A black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican all want to go out with
this girl. The guys find out the the girls dad is the devil, so
they ask him what they should do to be worthy of going out with
his daughter.
The devil tells them all to take down their pants, so they do.
The devil goes up to the white man and grabs his penis. The
penis immidiatley melts and the guy runs away yelling.
The devil goes up to the Mexican man and grabs his penis. And
like the other guys, it melts and he runs away yelling.
The devil now walks up to the black man and grabs his penis.
Nothing happens. The devil looks up at the man in bewilderment.
The black man replies, “Melts in your mouth, not in you hands!”
How do u get a black person to stop jumping on ur bed
put velcro on the ceiling
How do u get them down
Call three mexicans and tell them its a pinyada
There was a man who was heading away for a week on business. His
wife was incredibly horny and needed a good fuck every now and
again so she was left with a warning from her husband before he
left. He said, “If I find out that you have been shagging
another man while I’m gone then I will pull every pubic hair
from your crotch!”
He was dead serious but his wife thought she could occupy
herself for just one week using her fingers and the handle of
her tennis racquet (which she did a lot when her husband was
gone).
However she failed and one day before her husband was set to
return she was gagging for more than she could get from her
fingers and the tennis racquet! So she headed into town in the
hope of finding a large well-bodied fuckable man to satisfy her
lust. While walking down the High Street she found a very hunky
and sexy black man that she wouldn’t mind screwing and so she
walked up to him and said-“Will you come home with?” and the
black man replied, “Only for a chocolate biscuit.” She gave him
a biscuit and they headed towards her house.
So they got home and the woman said, “Will you come inside and
upstairs?”
“Only for a chocolate biscuit” So she gave him another biscuit.
So they got upstairs and into the woman’s bedroom. “Will you
take off your clothes and lie with me on the bed?”
“Only for a chocolate biscuit” So she gave him yet another
biscuit!!
“Will you fuck me until I hit orgasm at least three times!”
“Only for a chocolate biscuit” So she gave him a biscuit leaving
only one left in the box and they got to business.
He was drilling into her-fucking her harder and faster until she
was dripping wet-screwing her pussy and hitting her G-spot with
every hard core thrust. She was at her orgasmic peak and when it
was over they were both swollen and sore and so exhausted that
they fell asleep together in the bed.
The next mourning the husband arrived home from his trip and
headed upstairs to great his wife with a homecoming ride. She
heard him coming upstairs and immediately told the black to get
into the cupboard and hide. “Only for a chocolate biscuit” he
said and so she gave him the last chocolate biscuit and shoved
him into the cupboard just before her husband walked in.
He walked towards the bed and began to take off his clothes when
he stopped and spotted the white spunk stains on the lilac
sheets.
“You’ve been in bed with another man and don’t lie to me!!!!!!!”
His wife didn’t say a word and like he had warned he opened her
legs and began to pluck all her pubic hairs from her crotch one
by one. By the time he reached the last one he couldn’t get it
to come out and so he shouted, “Come out you black bastard!!!”
And the guy in the cupboard shouted “Only for a chocolate
biscuit!!!!!!”