Category: bar & drinking

The below are valid reasons as to why drinking should be allowed at work. If you use them wisely, you may even be able to convince your boss into allowing alcohol.1. It’s an incentive to show up.2. It reduces stress.3. It leads to more honest communications.4. It reduces complaints about low pay. 5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover.6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter.8. It encourages carpooling.9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you don’t care.10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.11. It makes fellow employees look better.12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted.14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.15. If something does something stupid on the job, it will be quickly forgotten.

yo mama so stupid she cant run past a bus

There was an girl name Jen.Jen is 16 years old.Jen goes to High school.Jen has 2 brothers and 1 sister.Jen has an boy Friend name Tod.One night when Jen went out on an Date with her Boy Friend Tod Jen and Tod sat by the annoying spot.Jen got annoyed Tod just liked that spot.Jen yelled at Tod and said Lets move to an diffrent spot!But Jen said Tod the waiter is about to come.Jen made an angry face and thought that Tod was an wierd Boy Friend and out of his Mind.Are you out of your Mind! yelled Jen

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Two blondes walk in to a bar one blonde ducks becase she saw a pole .what does the next blonde do ? Answer:she walked on to the pole

A man was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail when an exceptionally gorgeous & sexy young woman entered. She was so striking that the man could not take his eyes away from her. The young woman noticed his overly-attentive stare & walked directly toward him.

Before he could offer his apologies for being so rude, the young woman said to him, I’ll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $100 on one condition.’

Flabbergasted, the man asked what the condition was.

The young woman replied, ‘You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.’

The man considered her proposition for a moment, withdrew his wallet from his pocket & slowly counted out five $20 bills, which he pressed into the young woman’s hand.

He looked deeply into her eyes & slowly, meaningfully said…
‘Paint my house.’

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, “I’ve got to take you in, pal. You’re obviously drunk.”

Our wasted friend asked, “Officer, are ya absolutely sure I’m drunk?”

“Yeah, buddy, I’m sure,” said the copper. “Let’s go.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, “Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled.”

A construction worker walks into a bar. He’s a rather large, menacing guy. He orders a beer, chugs it back, and bellows, “All you guys on this side of the bar are a bunch of idiots!” A sudden silence descends.After a moment he asks “Anyone got a problem with that?” The silence lengthens.He then chugs back another beer and growls, “And all you guys on the other side of the bar are all scum!” Once again, the bar is silent.He looks around belligerently and roars, “Anyone got a problem with that?” A lone man gets up from his stool unsteadily and starts to walk towards the man.”You got a problem, buddy?” “Oh no; I’m just on the wrong side of the bar.”

There was this young pirate, and he walks in to this bar, and he has a steering wheel on his crotch. The bartender looks at him and says, “Hey what’s that?” and the pirate says, ” I dunno, but Arrrrr! It’s driving me nuts!”

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who rides bikes the most? male or female

female because they all have a monthly cycle

The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, ‘What’ll you have?’ The guy answers, ‘A scotch, please.’ The bartender hands him the drink, and says ‘That’ll be five dollars,’ to which the guy replies, ‘What are you talking about? I don’t owe you anything for this.’ A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation, then says to the bartender, ‘You know, he’s got you there. In the original offer, which constitutes a binding contract upon acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration.’ The bartender was not impressed, but says to the guy, ‘Okay, you beat me for a drink. But don’t ever let me catch you in here again.’ The next day, same guy walks into the bar. Bartender says, ‘What the heck are you doing in here? I can’t believe you’ve got the audacity to come back!’ The guy says, ‘What are you talking about? I’ve never been in this place in my life!’ The bartender replies, ‘I’m very sorry, but this is uncanny. You must have a double.’ To which the guy replies, ‘Thank you. Make it a scotch.’